Driving certainly was a rite of passage when I was growing up. In our high school, we used to have Wednesday afternoons off so we would all pile into cars, along with a case or two of beer and head to Washington Crossing state park for an afternoon of frivolity. There was also the opportunity for adventure, complete with the dangers that sometimes accompany it.
On one winter day, me and three friends decided to go for a drive in my 67 Plymouth Barricuda, after a fresh snow on tires with minimal tread . All was going well until we came upon a bridge crossing just wide enough for two cars. There was a fair decline leading to the bridge and just as I entered it I saw a car entering from the other side, facing similar conditions. I was traveling faster than I should have been. If I tried to brake there’s no doubt I would have ended up sideways and at best ping- ponged off the sides of the bridge and at worst, crash through it and into the river below. All I could do was try and keep the car straight and in my lane while hoping the other guy could do the same. As we approached there was dead silence, four pounding hearts notwithstanding. One small error by either of us would have resulted in bent metal and a lot of explaining to my parents. Thankfully he kept his head, and we passed without incident. There isn’t a video game that could inspire the rush of fear, hope, and empowerment we all experienced at that moment. I’ve had other such moments in my life. I suspect that one did much to prepare me for the rest of them.
Parents thought a curfew would keep their daughter from getting into trouble. Trouble could be found after school, long before dark! As regards the back seat of cars, a young girl was safer on a motorcycle! I remember with fondness my days as a carhop, carrying milkshakes and burgers to cars. I met more boys. ... The late sixties and early seventies were the very best!
We live in a different world now. When I grew up there was no internet or cable tv. There were no supervised after school activities. The area I lived was still pretty undeveloped so for the most part, we had to devise activities to amuse ourselves. Sometimes that meant playing “chicken” on a frozen pond to see who could skate closest to the thin ice without falling through. Sometimes it meant constructing ramps and jumping them on our bikes. I can say from experience that nothing focuses ones mind so acutely as making a landing without scraping face first across the dirt or landing crotch first on the bike’s cross bar. As I entered my teen years the risks we undertook increased, like fashioning a toboggan out of a piece of discarded corrugated tin with my father, attaching it to the back of his station wagon with a piece of rope and speeding through a snow-covered peach orchard. Maybe the most exhilarating activity was piling onto a chopped, V-8 powered Ford station wagon my uncle fashioned into a sort of dune buggy. Its sole passenger features consisted of a bench seat and a sheet of plywood over the gas tank. Seat belts and handles weren’t included. My cousin, who was a bit older, usually drove and he seemed obsessed with trying to throw us all off with sudden, high-speed turns. The most memorable attempt involved getting the buggy onto two wheels.
Unfortunately, the pond we used to skate on has been allowed to silt in because heaven forbid, someone might drown. The makeshift ramps we used to construct have been replaced with skate parks and governed by safety rules promulgated by personal injury lawyers and insurance underwriters. The farms we used to slide across and traverse on two wheels are now county parks where such activities have been replaced with walking paths, bird watching stations and dog parks. I’m not sure how our youth's reaction to the restrictions and reduced opportunities for free expression will play out. I suspect the teenage mobs that have recently rampaged downtown Chicago may provide a clue.
As into internet discussions posters here on the Free Press are, I suspect that most have them have a good sense of being plugged-in while remaining relatively well attached to reality.
They’ve become the submissive bed wetting basket cases our dependency groomers in DC wish them to be. Living, iPhone in hand, with a long list of existential threats...racism, hate speech, transphobia, climate change, permanent COVID, unsafe spaces, driving, abortion access, intimacy with an actual human, competition, taking tests, white supremacy, inequity, FOMO, making simple decisions...is just too much to bear for our sensitive young adults in this cruel world of ours. Failing to understand that those avidly stoking fears were to be ignored is one of the many mistakes they’ll regret later on.
Fantastic comment - you nailed it. It’s up to us to teach them to break free. The root of everything is fear and free speech. If they’re too afraid to express themselves, they won’t drive, date, live, etc. I wrote an open letter to the leaders of Substack about protecting free speech - will The Free Press and its brilliant readers co sign it? https://substack.com/profile/64905469-yuri-bezmenov/note/c-14787883
Canada's dangerous current government is poised to pass Bill C-11 to censor the Internet. This group of fools argues that the bill will protect Canadian content in the era of online streaming, but that is a ruse. It will censor online content -- including criticism of their policies -- and close the door to global markets.
Justin Trudea is a lunatic as are the Clintons, the Obamas, Jeff Bizos, and the whole Biden administration, is a scam, if we leave the situation as it is we doomed to hell, we need to take our lives back today how I have no idea maybe we all just go back to basics of Flag,Family and country we have to start somewhere.
True, but other than embedding that in our constitution and building the most successful advanced society in the history of mankind around free speech, no fear, and the rights of the individual; what can be done? If 50% of the population thinks free speech and individual rights are “hate speech” and “systemic racism/ eco-terrorism “ then we are done. Put a fork in us. We had a good run though!
I'm not convinced that anywhere near 50% of people believe that. We're just letting a loud and motivated minority tell us all what to do. I know I have nothing but anecdotal evidence of this, but it is how I feel...or perhaps HAVE to feel so I don't lose all hope.
I hear you, Kevin. Unfortunately, my “evidence” is
actual polling data, election results, and objective reality. Anecdotally I’d wager that 50% is being conservative and that it’s much higher.
But what do I know? I live in a state that has legalized drugs and criminal behavior, closed churches and gymnasiums, arrested people for organizing and protesting, forced children to take experimental drugs, encourages illegal immigration on an unprecedented scale, and just banned gas powered cars…
I have hope too, but it’s starting to turn to anger. Another pop-culture phrase from the 1980’s: “You won’t like me when I’m angry”
I wondered if you were lumping all people who voted a specific way. And that is why I don't totally buy it. Plenty of people on either side of the political divide don't 100% agree with everything their side does. People vote the way they do for lots of reasons. And sometimes they do it without fully understanding what they voted for. I would put money down that plenty of people will leave an area because their own politicians 'ruined' it, and then go to a new place and vote for the same things that screwed up the place they just left.
My suspicion is that many people are more moderate in general, but they may have a couple of issues that end up pulling them to one side or the other. And at times a political movement may take a rather radical position on a topic, but not everyone who ends up voting for that movement necessarily agrees with it. Or in some cases even knows for certain that is what they just voted for. Too many people get their info from narrow (or even faulty) sources. And politicians do a great job or misrepresenting themselves.
On top of that, both parties have become opposites as far as their platforms. If one is for something the other will be against it. So if you have a item that is super important to you, say, abortion, you only have 1 party to vote for that supports your view. And voting for them means you get ALL of the other things as well, like it or not.
All of that is why I wish we had more than 2 parties (or NO parties).
1st off, thank you for your reply. I can see you think about things more than skin deep.
I am inclined to agree with you but I increasingly am having difficulty defending a single position put forth by the Democrat party. There are some positions held by the Republican Party that I disagree with, but at least I can have intelligent civil discussions with conservatives I disagree with. Not so with Leftists and Democrats these days.
I have more than one issue that is a priority to me for sure. I used to be a liberal democrat, you know, pro-democracy, constitution, equal justice under the law, American exceptionalism, free speech, anti-war, anti-racism/sexism/homophobia, pro-labor, strong middle class, LIFE, liberty, and “you know the thing!” 🤪…blah blah blah
I can no longer find a single one of those core issues that the left leaning Democrat party defends or isn’t outright destroying in name and deed.
Can you? If so, please elaborate. I won’t be snarky or bite. I just really can not truthfully find an issue that I agree with the Democrats on. Not one.
Am I brainwashed or something? Did they really just promote racism, identity politics, start a world war, keep our kids out of school for over 2 years, promote one race of people over another, promote censorship of free speech, put razor wire up around our Capital, force children to take experimental drugs, burn down cities and attack police nationwide, hold political prisoners in gulags, and now attempt to have their political opponents (and church goers, people who post memes, and any other people they disagree with) arrested and thrown in prison?
I’m sorry, there is no more middle ground here for me to “reach out” to. They, the Democrat party, are literally the opposite of everything I have ever learned to love and respect about the USA.
Please convince me I’m wrong. But do it before the Democrats ban/cancel/censor us from being able to discuss it here on Substack.
I know many people who vote Democrat, who think they are Democrat, who think they know what they are voting for, but they really have no idea. Some of these people care a lot about abortion. They also get crazy news sent to them. Like "GOP is trying to ban all books"
I remember one of my dad’s favorite insults to people who proudly claimed they were from California…He would say “Congratulations! That’s a good place …to be from!” 😂
Haha no, it’s California. But my brother lived in Kent. He was a big fan until apparently he couldn’t take it anymore and moved to Portland. Talk about “out of the frying pan into the fire” 😂
It means "we should be the change we wish to see in the world". It means "somebody should do something, and we are somebody". It means " think globally, act locally". It means "if not us, who; if now, when?"...
These quotes are more than mindless koans - these statements are the wisdom of centuries, the empowerment of the individual to change the world. But the System is teaching learned helplessness against itself and empowerment only through the itself. We must take back our own power, and recognise our ability to change what we can where we can.
We start by meeting Humans face to face whenever possible, outside the constraints of the internet. Build the local wetware network -
<i>It means "we should be the change we wish to see in the world". It means "somebody should do something, and we are somebody". It means " think globally, act locally". It means "if not us, who; if now, when?"...</i>
Those are all bumper stickers.
I want you to lay out the plan for instructing a generation of slackers how to be engaged with the world, when their parents have already raised them to be exactly that way and when the Big Tech they worship WANTS them to stay brain dead. Because the "learned helplessness" of which you speak is fueled in part by bumper stickers.
So I want to hear the details. You know, like a business plan. How do individuals without control over other individuals, who do not want to be influenced by other than "influencers (in the worst possible way)" & who suffer from the disease of woke hive mind, brain death, etc., impart their wisdom of centuries which presumably is now, what, genetically expressed? I live my life with as much interaction as I can, but the last time I had a great interaction with someone, there was not a single horde of teenagers nearby to witness it. I mean, do I contact high schools & do my interacting as a guest lecturer? No bumper stickers, please. I already do meet humans face to face whenever possible, but so far it hasn't made a dent & I do have a day job.
I don't mean to be snippy here, but words are the cheapest things out there.
First, let me say it sounds like you are really trying to be engaged, and secondly, that you frustrated by it. That's how I KNOW you are genuinely involved. There is a cost when we try to interact - it wears down the soul when we work hard and it seems to make no difference. So thank you for trying, even when no one sees.
Next, yes, those sayings ARE 'bumperstickers'. Thats why I chose them. They are wise words, familiar to us, but we no longer recognise them, because they have been spoken without action. That leads us to dismiss them. We have lost their power, because we have abused them.
Finally I'm genuinely honored you think that I would have the plan to fix this.
My plan starts with me.
1) I recognise my own Power to change the world, even when no one else does.
- I must fight against my own learned helplessness. I DO make a difference.
2) My Gift is my Power. I must find my Gift, and give it.
- I write. Some people cook. Others teach, or hammer nails. What is your gift? Give it.
3) I will find the Ones to whom I will give my Gift.
-Online and off, Interaction is limited in this world, so I must find my forum. The mundane is frequently overlooked. The grocery store, church, work, home; I must offer my gift freely, even if it is just a smile, and don't stop giving just because of haters.
4) I will see the Human behind the interface.
-Online or off, People behind the barriers need to know they are valued. My support and encouragement mean a great deal. and the mssage I wish to share is connected to that support.
5) I will recognise the Opportunity when it comes.
-Look for the Hidden Path, the moment when the door opens.
6) I will know my Message and speak it boldly.
-What do I need to say? How can I say it in love? Write it down and work it in.
7) I will refresh my Spirit
-Encountering people and giving my best requires me to take care of me.
8) Try again.
-I won't give up.
9) I will Fight until the Battle is won or done.
-Let the Battle end, not because I quit, but because I fought until I won, or could fight no more.
10) I will give the encounter to God, and leave it in His Hands.
-When it is over, I ask if I did all I could do. If I didn't, I ask forgiveness and try harder. If I did all I could do, then I give it to God, and let the planted seed bloom under His care.
That is my plan for me. I'm sure it sounds trite, but they are words of my Father...
words are cheap only to those who don't value them. These words are more precious to me than Gold, because I know what they meant to the One who taught me.
I'm not "trying to be engaged." I am just living my life in the way that is suited to my demeanor and personality. So you don't need to "thank" me, any more than you need to thank me for, I don't know. "Trying to have hazel eyes," which I already do. I don't actually care what you think of how I live my life or how grateful you are for it.
And I'm not frustrated by my or anyone else's degree of engagement, which they have a right to choose. I'm frustrated by the airy-fairy nature of your post. And believe me when I tell you that I've airy-fairied with the best of them, having hitchhiked to many Rainbow Gatherings in the 80s where I ran around naked & believed completely in everything. So I recognize hippy when I see it.
I do dismiss those bumper stickers because reading them accomplishes nothing. They are a thing we can say that allows us & others to think we are making some kind of difference, but in the end it's filler. Chaff. Feelz to make us think we are accomplishing things, like those posts people put on social media, "like if you hate animal cruelty." Sure. And?? A picture of an abused animal gets a gazillion likes & presumably is still being abused.
Giving smiles is all well & good, but the degree by which first-world smiles make the lives of starving 3rd-world children better is less than negligible. I mean, your "power to change the world." Change it how, and in what way, and in what way, and in what way? What's the business plan? Are you physically solving the problem or giving money to people who can?
Sorry, but your second post is just a bumper sticker that requires the side of a bus, same as the other stuff only more. I don't have a lot of patience for it.
Last: Koans are anything but mindless. In fact they're the complete opposite.
Lockdowns haven't been good, but I spent spring of 2020 in my car, because gas was $2.00 a gallon, exploring various remote rural areas precisely because I didn't want to get infected.
My wife and I had a similar reaction. We spent a month in 2021 driving small highways from Washington State to North Carolina and and back, staying in small towns we didn't know anything about, trying to learn more about this country now.
"See the USA in your Chevrolet" used to be a thing. To a lot of drivers now, the interstate territory between big cities is the driving equivalent of flyover country. Never venture farther off the main highway farther than necessary to find gas and a double latte.
I've noticed this as well, but it has benefits for those unafraid of small town, backcountry America. I hesitate to advertise this "hack" because I wouldn't want to ruin it, but the truth is that most urbanites wouldn't pay attention anyway.
When we evacuated the Tampa Bay area for Hurricane Irma, we left at 3 am and took the back roads north, avoiding the slowly moving parking lot of I-75 at all costs (despite evil Google maps constantly trying to direct us back to the freeway). My son's friend's family left at almost the exact same time, but took the freeway. Both kids had Instagram or Snapchat (not sure which one), which has a tracking feature so users can tell where their online buddies are, setting up an unplanned but very illuminating experiment.
Well, by 8:30 am, we were breakfasting at a Waffle House in south Georgia while they were somewhere around Ocala. We were pulling into our hotel in Rome, northwest of Atlanta, when they finally crossed the state line into Georgia.
Because of this, I think the horror classic "Deliverance" should be broadcast constantly throughout Florida prior to and during hurricane season. Keep all those urbanites scared stiff of hillbillies and other rural folk so that they stay on the interstates and leave the backroads uncongested for my convenient and unobstructed travel.
I wonder if one remedy for everything happening now would be more road trips. Driving through vastly different parts of the country and seeing that most people, no matter where, are largely just People might make folks feel less like they are constantly under attack from those unknown people out there.
If nothing else, it might help us all have a little more context about the world we live in instead of assuming our bubbles are the sum total of reality
Road trips are a blast. When my sons moved out, I worried how my husband and I would do together. We went on a road trip from San Diego to Dallas, to Memphis, to St. Louis, to Bozeman, and back to San Diego. It was so much fun and renewed both of us. along the way we stopped to see places that were along the way, Elvis' house, the ducks at the Peabody Hotel, the Arch, Mt. Rushmore, and more. If you can, go!
I especially enjoyed rural areas because they were much more likely to be sane and non-hysterical regarding things like masking, one-way grocery store isles (remember that comedy?), etc.
Who? Certainly not their parents. I made a point of not having kids, so I don't plan to instruct a lost generation, which IMHO cannot be saved. The simple answer is: "no one."
This predates lockdowns by a more than decade at least, RH.
This article is basically describing reality, as the writer and we once knew it, versus online. And reality is losing. Social media has allowed an entire generation to live, meet people, love (or a version thereof..), learn (or a version thereof), be entertained, join virtual worlds, play games, get upset, and have sex in the mundane ubiquity of basements, darkened rooms and as they wait in line for a smoothie. It is the new conformity, as you alluded to.
The real world is losing, and we have AI to look forward to in taking the artificial to a whole other level. Gen Z is already screwed, but what about the five years olds on iphones now?
Yes, the ground work was laid long before Lockdown, or it could not have worked. We must keep trying, though. We see what is happening. We have power to do something about it...
if I do nothing, I too succumb to the message of powerlessness. I refuse to be another victim of the war against Humanity.
The lockdowns are recent history that lasted two years. This has been going on a long time. I started to see it with my son’s friends. He turns 30 next month. I noted in an earlier response, driving is a responsibility, and we took that off kids’ To Do lists long ago.
Agreed completely on this point - the destruction of adulthood has been an ongoing war of attrition, over at least the last decade. Seeing it come to fruition with the lockdowns has been mindboggling.
These are the fruits of oppression; to rage against the machine only when the machine allows it, and to go only where one is told to go...who will teach them to fight back, and break free?
Are the riots on Chicago's magnificent mile good? It is the rage of young men fighting back and breaking free of society's rules, but it seems unsupportable rather than praise worthy.
It is not fighting back when one is fighting FOR - that is compliance, to do what one is told to do, to do what one is allowed. They were told to do this - and they did. Through social media, high societal approval and propaganda, these rioters have been explicity told to rage in that place and time.
-They were instructed by social media post to riot at that time and place
-Little enforcement was made, and police are being defunded
-The Mayor of Chicago condemns those who criticise the riots - NOT the rioters: "It is not constructive to demonize youth who have otherwise been starved of opportunities in their own communities.”
These youth were starved BY their communities, then fed lies in its place. They are only allowed to rage where the machine tells them to rage. They were not allowed to go to church during lockdowns, not allowed to visit loved ones...
No, to the whole " the machine" idea. Not a believer in an overarching conspiracy, plot, or machine. Find it frightening that people believe that their actions are controlled by another and they have no ability to select their destiny.
Being "powerless" against "the machine" removes responsibility for any action. Actions have rewards and consequences intended and unintended. This is not deny larger factors like the country one is born in or your childhood, but within one's realm there is some control.
Refusing to be an eternal Victim is the first step to Freedom. Freedom takes responsibility, because it acknowledges autonomy of action. "I choose to take this action" is a declaration of independence; "Look what you made me do" is an Abuser wearing the mantle of Victimhood.
The constant “you’re killing the planet” moniker doesn’t help either. And with an Administration bent on making the US drive electric cars it will get worse. They are more expensive, the environmental cost to produce them is astronomical. Why would an Administration push to electrify a nation with less dense energy, requiring raw materials that rape the Congo. All in contrast to the facts and worse, common sense. Why must we change over to vehicles powered by batteries? I live in a cold environment where a battery will not perform when it is cold outside and in ten years will still not perform. The answer is simple; Government doesn’t want citizens mobile anymore.
We already have lived through the best the US could provide. We are watching the slow demise.
Good comment though - I was beginning to think I was the only one that couldn’t figure out why anyone would buy an electric car other than to virtue signal. Totally impractical if you live in a cold climate or need a car to drive long distances to visit family once or twice a year.
Most families have more than one car. I can completely see having an electric car for day-to-day use such as going to the store, running errands, etc. and then a gas powered car for the longer drives.
Agreed, an EV is fine if you can also have a real car. In fact any piece of junk is fine as long as you can also have a good version. The problem is that the government is mandating a date when you will no longer be able to buy the food version. That’s how you know EVs are inferior. No one had to mandate the transition away from horses, because people actually wanted it. No one set a sunset date for film cameras, digital just got too good and easy to pass up. No one wants EVs because they are worse in 9 out of 10 ways so they have to force us.
But that is not the vision…it’s total electric, with no gas powered autos…why not mandate hybrids, why such a draconian vision, especially since there is no way to have China, India, et al comply
I own an electric car and could not be happier with it. It seems a lot of the animosity is political in nature and if we're throwing stones at companies/industries that have received bailouts/kickbacks/subsidies, we're going to run out of rocks (incidentally, the tax rebate is quite literally the one instance I have received a special largess from the gov't and was not the determining factor in my purchase).
Obviously individual circumstances change the analysis (I live in a house and installed a charger, we still own an ICE vehicle, and I plan to install solar to mitigate the vagaries of asinine energy policies and pricing...and claim back some more of my misspent tax $'s). YMMV
Why I like the car (relative to an ICE vehicle):
I'm not listing a number of areas where BEV manufacturers have raised the bar but that are also feasible and starting find their way into ICE (for example touch screen interfaces, sensors and self driving capabilities), or that are unique to my particular BEV.
- Handling has proven superior to ICE equivalent, mostly due to lower center of gravity & torque vectoring enabled by individual/multiple drive motors.
- (Much) Higher HP and torque. Translates to power when I need it and superior towing capacity/experience (if not tow range).
- More storage space (no engine/no gas tank) relative to ICE equivalent (battery space is recouped by the elimination of exhaust system and driveshaft)
- Regenerative braking (one pedal driving) means I hardly need to use brakes and allows me to modulate my speed much more efficiently (generally results in a much more relaxed driving experience).
- Ability to charge (fill up) at home and for (substantially) less $/mile
Cons:
- Range: This was my biggest concern prior to purchase. In reality the driving/charging experience is better for 99% of my daily driving and incidentally (and surprisingly to me) for most of my road trips (<350 miles one way - varying weather/temp conditions); in my experience it's added an incremental 15mins to these trips without changing my driving style. Have not yet tried, but likely inferior for longer trips. Generally, range is a concern on road trips.
- Charge times: Daily is not an issue (car charges while I sleep). For road trips as mentioned above, it adds ~15 mins for most of my normal trips (expect that spread to increase on longer trips requiring more charges). I'll be more comfortable as the infrastructure continues to build out.
- Battery is warrantied for 8yrs; roughly as long as I typically own my car (but replacing batteries would be concern).
On a policy note, it's unfortunate that both sides have gone into their camps. I personally like that BEVs introduce optionality and allows us to diversify our energy consumption mix. That the pols inevitably find a way to politicize it, is a shame.
I keep wondering what will happen when CA gets one of their many annual wild fires, and people whose cars aren't charged because charging takes hours, are stuck unable to get away because Newsom gave an edict they must all drive electric cars.
And yeah, these climate change trenders don't have a clue or don't care their push for electric cars are killing children and people in Congo and destroying their world wholesale.
California's Gavin Newsome has done exactly NOTHING to improve an antiquated electrical grid that has trouble providing day to day service. Yet he is travelling to "red" states to tell them why they are wrong and how they should emulate California!
Your last comment is very sad. I was a veteran of the War on Drugs (on the Drug side.), survived the Sexual Revolution and experienced an era of unprecedented creativity in music. The economy roared along for the most part and then came computers and the Internet.
And yes, NOTHING was better than making a beer run to Evanston on the weekend (Salt Lake City only had 3.2 beer), through the mountains full of HP who just KNEW there were kids picking up kegs, waiting on the 100 mile run. Cranking the rock, making out in the back seat, daring...just daring...and these kids have "correct attitudes and mindful speech" to compensate for not doing any of that stuff? God, no wonder they have depression and anxiety and respond with hateful savagery if anyone asks them to prove any of their beliefs.
Like I said, sad. I almost feel guilty for how much better my youth was, even despite the near absence of free porn.
I grew up in a rural area. We had old cars that often did not run. It sucks to be stuck. I would choose a hybrid maybe but not likely. I prefer cold climates. I want a car to start.
The other thing that bothers me about EV batteries is the environmental degradation that will happen to create the batteries, the mining necessary to get the materials necessary. Does that matter to environmental activists?
This breaks my heart. As a teenager in the late 90's my list of "can't wait" to dos was endless. I was at the DMV on my 15th birthday applying for my learner's permit, and again in my 16th birthday taking my driving test. I wasted no time to enjoy every right of passage we traditionally associate with teenage life. Fast forward to today: my 15-year-old son is perfectly content to spend a weekend in solitude. I had to beg him for weeks to study for his learner's permit, and since getting said permit 6+weeks ago, I've convinced him to go out for one driving lesson, which he begrudgingly agreed to provided it lasted no more than 10 minutes. I keep telling myself it's a "phase" but more and more I think it's a generational disease.
The solitude thing is really weird, isn’t it? My 16-year-old son spends far less time in person with his peers than I did. (They’re all on Discord.) He does hang out with them after school for band, stage crew, chess club, etc., but I think they’ve done one spontaneous activity not related to school in two years.
My son did just get his license, so here’s hoping!
At least he got his license & does activities in person, that's good
Does he have a job yet? Kids need jobs. Mine are elementary school but required to do chores at home. And no way will I ever give them any money, for anything. I want them to start working as soon as they can. I started baby-sitting age 9
He got a work permit at 15 for a seasonal job last fall. It was a great experience, but he’s going to concentrate on getting his Eagle Scout rank this summer. (That’s a job in itself.)
I started baby sitting at 11, cleaning apartments at a retirement home at 13.
And yes, I think the two main problems are overscheduled kids, especially sports, which gets Soviet-style intense around middle school, and electronics.
I agree: over scheduling kids, activities & electronic
mine are elementary school but we don't schedule them for anything or do any activities. Friends of ours do, but I'm personally not into driving around activities. Not something I want to do. We just send them out to play in the yard or play in the basement if bad weather. Or go see if neighbors are outside. I plan to avoid smartphones & will give them simple (no-data/wifi) phones in jr high. I limit screen time to 1 hr/day max.
Is there anything we can do to improve this? Last year, I partnered with the mom of one of his friends, and we would kick one out of the house to go fishing, or play yu-gi-oh at the other's house. They had a great time, but neither would pursue it on his own. I think my son is worried he'll look "weird" if he's the one to suggest he and his friends actually do something. He's not a timid guy at all, but when it comes to social relations, I think teenagers don't have the context we used to, where we'd just go to someone's house and hang out till dinner.
yea that's so strange. I used to just ride my bike around with friends, all day, doing who knows what, random spontaneous things & my parents had no idea where I was...lol...and I'm in my 30s now
maybe because kids these days have so many planned activities? Mine are elementary school but we usually just tell them "go play in the yard by yourselves" or "go play in the basement" if weather is bad. We'll go for a walk & see if anyone is out, spontaneous. I don't pay for any scheduled activities for them. I'm not interested in being a soccer mom/hockey mom.
Mine was the same but once he finally got his license he was out of here. They all go to the mountains and 24 hour diners and stay out late doing stupid stuff. Of course I get mad and set boundaries but secretly I’m glad they’re making mistakes and learning lessons that don’t involve remote controls and virtual reality.
My son rode his boogie board on a flooded stream on a golf course under bridges and such at night. He also went with friends to parking structures at 2 am to skateboard in them. I never found out until much later. I'm glad.
My eldest son is 36 and doesn’t drive. My middle son is 31 and has just passed his driving test. My youngest son doesn’t drive and he’s 29. None of them live at home, and the two younger ones have children of their own. They don’t spend all their time at home either. They live a couple of hours from me, by train. I just recently visited my 31 year old and my granddaughter. We’re planning another visit soon. None of us feel particularly disadvantaged not having a car. I’m happy about it actually, I’m no longer a sitting target for everyone that wants to make a quick buck - gas stations, insurance companies, local authorities, parking garage companies, but I recognise I’m in the minority. My wife and I get just about everywhere we want, albeit sometimes a little slower. I never have to worry about DUI either, although my wild party all-night drinking days are long past, I can enjoy a few drinks with dinner when we go out and not worry.
I think it’s sad that so many people don’t have access to good public transportation. I actually live in suburban London, England. I have bus service 24/7. I am a 15-20 minute ride from work; my wife about 40 minutes. There is very limited parking where I work and my wife would have to pay a daily rate to park near her workplace. We are just lucky, and I realise that not everyone has the option of not having a car.
The UK is around 60% the size of CA. Plus Europe has long had more efficient mass transit. For a time I drove 60 miles one way to work, no-one in the UK is doing that.
There are some that do that, but most would use rail transport. The US once had a comprehensive rail network but passenger numbers fell away a lot earlier there, than in Europe. Railroad mileage in the US reached its peak in 1916, whereas in the UK it was some twenty years later. In a few areas of the UK, some of the lost lines have been re-instated. Many conurbations in the UK have serious traffic problems, due to high density of cars, similar to some areas of the US.
Gasoline has been less expensive in the US than in the UK or most of Europe, but in my own experience, when I lived in the US, my gas bill was at least as high as in the UK, as I had to drive everywhere. Here, i can walk to local 7-11, my nearest bar, the doctors, dentist, and local park. Land use here is much denser.
nope. no one is doing that. in fact in the UK they are now implementing "15 min cites" where everyone can stay within the "circle". the population is so much easier to control when yhou know where they are at all times. the UK ?? cctv EVERYWHERE and I mean everywhere. the UK citizens are complacent and compliant..and very aware of class
I just moved from Seattle and although they are increasing ways to get around publicly they also are dealing with significant increases in crimes on public transportation.
I'd never in a million years subject myself to the danger. The local news even had a segment where they FILMED a homeless guy smoking fentanyl on one bus and it's become a thing lately. The other commuters just sat there quietly while the guy poisoned the air around them.
Add to this all the crime in other big cities on public transportation and you just have to wonder why anyone would choose that over owning their own car (or even ride sharing)
Is the risk of public transit greater than the risk of driving? The risk of dying in a car crash is 13 per 100,000 people per year. The NYC subway has 84 million trips per month. Assuming the same people ride every day twice a day equals 6 million unique riders. There were 88 deaths on the subway last year so your odds are 8.8 per 100,000. Couldn't find injury stats per person for both so couldn't do a comparison there.
Maybe that's true but while I'm taking higher chances in my own car I don't have to keep a weary eye on everyone around me and don't have to put up with the smells of unwashed people or their rantings at the ceiling.
Our son lives in Berlin. The public transportation is good, but I wonder about elderly people. If you're healthy and strong, public transportation is great, but when walking becomes challenging or you have to drag your groceries home in a little hand cart two or three times a week, what happens then? Do all elderly people get warehoused in large facilities or do the death panels kick in?
someone has to get you to the train station..what do you do with your grandchildren when you visit. stay at home.. no zoos.. no playgrounds. .. no trips to interesting places. and those "quick bucks". it is called employment
It’s a really strange thing. I turned 16 in 2004 and had my license on my 16th birthday. I grew up on a farm, though, and driving meant freedom and the only line to my friends. I was also the last of the kids in CO that only had to have a permit for 6 months and didn’t have to take drivers ed. I do think that the cost and time commitment of drivers ed is prohibitive - or at least used as an excuse - for some families.
That said, all of my younger siblings got drivers licenses when they were 16, if not quite on their birthday. When I was teaching high school in the 2010s, I thought it was really strange how many kids didn’t seem to worry about getting a license. That was in a fairly rural area, too. Seems it’s only gotten more common.
I love to drive. I don’t understand the point of a self-driving car - why buy a car and never drive it yourself? - and I feel sorry for kids that don’t see the value in driving.
I hope you are not giving him any money, "Allowance" or paying him for doing chores?
Kids need jobs. They need to work. So so so important. Mine are elementary school but required to do chores at home. And no way will I ever give them any money, for anything. I want them to start working as soon as they can. I started baby-sitting age 9
It takes failure and then overcoming that failure to develop self-esteem. Kids fear failure and parents no longer encourage it… that those same children then lack self-esteem is no surprise, the surprise is that we continue to promote the same “safety” at the expense of human development
I'm venture that all parents face a similar problem. The difference is for almost all of human history, adults had no choice but to force their kids to keep going because food had to be put on the table. Now, life is also way too easy for most adults, and we aren't dealing with it any better than the kids are. Exercise, fresh air, and some manufactured hardships have helped me... though no idea what difference that makes to others. That, and forcing myself to try to learn something tangible. Whether it's household projects, getting chickens (are current foray), learning to hunt, whatever. I try to keep challenging myself to learn tangible skills so my children can see the benefit of struggling, redoing, struggling again, and slowly figuring it out. I'm not sure I have any better advice than giving kids something to strive for, allowing them to fail, and rewarding performance (as long as that performance was EARNED).
And, my eternal plea for service. One of the best things you can do for children, especially in an era where social media is just fake perfect lives and kids (and many adults) come to believe that's reality (especially because of how class-divided most communities are these days), is allow them to not only see what difficulty looks like, but to step up and make a real difference and learn about both themselves and the world around them from understanding those differences. We ALL could use more service in our life, but perhaps children who are driven to school, and driven to soccer practice where they practice on perfectly manicured fields in new cleats every year watching their ipad between games while they sip on designer beverages (I'm mocking myself now, not you if you're reading this) could use it the most...
I agree service & volunteering in the community are very beneficial for kids
Senator Ben Sasse of Nebraska sends his 3 kids to farms and ranches in Nebraska to learn life lessons. I hope to do this with my kids when they are a bit older!
"The Vanishing American Adult: Our Coming-of-Age Crisis and How to Rebuild a Culture of Self-Reliance"
Senator Sasse: "We want them to get dirt under their fingernails," he said, "and we want them to have to get up at 4:30 a.m. when they don't want to."
He says these experiences help build "scar tissue for the soul."
"I think we are doing a bad job of helping our kids understand that they have resiliency," he said. "Persevering and getting through hardship makes you tough."
"I think this category of perpetual adolescence, it's a new thing, and it's a dangerous thing. Adolescence is intentionally transitioning from childhood to adulthood. Being stuck in adolescence — that's a hell. Peter Pan is a dystopia, and we forget that. Neverland is a bad place to be. It is good for kids to learn how to work. Right now, we're acting like keeping our kids free from work is a way to treat them really nicely, when in reality thoughtful parenting wants to help free our kids to find meaning in work."
I was definitely chauffeured to many horse shows and soccer practices when I was younger, but then as a consequence of divorce, basically left to fend for myself after 15. No drivers license until my boyfriend drove me to the DMV at 18, I’d travel 6+ hours by train and bus, NYC to NH, to get between my parents. (Nothing I would ever trust my kids to do, and looking back, I’m horrified that I did it.) Having seen all ends of it, both as a kid, and now as a teacher and mom, there are so many variables and ‘ways to skin the cat.’
My kids are still young- 6 and 8, and many things come naturally to them. But my daughter is in choir this spring, didn’t get a solo, likes it enough to keep going, but is also exhausted with it. So that has been a good experience.
In one of my last posts, I discussed how the ‘parenting-industrial complex’ is harming kids, and so much of it is wrapped up in that projection of perfect lifestyle. I’m implementing parent outreach in my community to try and shift the culture.
I agree w/ you about ‘parenting-industrial complex’ harming kids & projection of perfect lifestyle. Social media destroys kids/teens & causes anxiety/depression/suicide. One thing that I like about myself: I could care less what people think of me & peer pressure has Zero effect on me. I don't use social media or show off my lifestyle. If anything, I try to hide my wealth. My husband & I both grew up without much money, now we are doing well via hard work. But I want my kids to experience as much hardship as possible. For their future well-being. We don't do any scheduled activities. My mom friends try to convince me but I'm not doing it. LOL. We send them to the yard to play on their own or the basement to play on their own. We go to the neighborhood playground.
I'm also doing this (no smartphones/smart devices til 8th grade, they will have no-data simple phones):
Congrats on the third! I also have a one year old but she is quite persistent. 😅 I have heard of wait until 8th and completely agree. But I am also hopeful that we are at *peak woke* etc and there will be a cultural correction.
Let them fail and keep trying. If they cry/throw a tantrum, tell them to try again
I have little kids too
We gotta let them fail & learn from mistakes
Also independent, unstructured play. Always. Nothing scheduled. No activities. We tell them "go in the backyard & play on your own" if its nice out. If weather is bad "go play in the basement"
I really fought with myself about the organized sports thing bc I always figured my kids would play sports- I liked it and learned a lot of great lessons from them. But the schedules are brutal- we did one season of T-Ball and never again.
Ironically, many of my kids tantrums happen during their copious amounts of unstructured outdoor play time!! They have ‘rage to perfection’ big time.
yea the schedules are too much. esp "travel sports" is something I don't want to do. I talk to parents who do "travel sports", they basically spend M-F working, then their weekends (which are supposed to be your well-deserved time off!) are spent waking up at 4:30am to drive 3 hours to another state, spend the entire day there, and then drive back 3 hours. this is every weekend. These people are Exhausted. And its super expensive!
When I was a kid, I did school sports (jr high, high school) so my parents didnt drive me, the bus drove me, and I did park district which I rode my bike there. I would totally let my kids do school sports if school is driving them. No problem. When they are older, I'm fine letting them do park district, though I would limit it to 1 sport at a time. but no travel sports. I'm not going to spend every weekend suffering all day.
The expense in both time and money is absurd. We mess around on the tennis courts, but I’ve also realized how young they still are to really be pushed too hard. Which has been hard to wrap my mind around compared to how I was raised.
FREEDOM.The feeling of freedom is what driving has always meant to me and millions of others. The freedom to get in your car and just... DRIVE. I am sure I am not alone in remembering times of sadness where I just took off for an hour or two. Alone in my car. To regroup. To think. And to listin to a device that is now attack: AM stations playing great music. Today freedom is not in vogue . The truth is that real freedom scares many of those under 25. Perhaps because they have never really felt it. Very sad. I cannot wait for my next road trip. As an older guy the main difference is that I need "health stops" much more frequently than in days gone by! Kids, get out there and "See the USA in your Chevrolet."
One more thing. Even today as I start a long road trip I text close family my favorite road song to listen to as I sing it very LOUD : Willie Nelson's "On the road again."
In Waterbury, Vt for the weekend and was joyously passed by a flock of bikers on their Harleys (and a few Kawasakis), and from what I could tell, no one riding was under sixty..
Once in a while I see a young daredevil on a motorcycle weaving through Interstate traffic, and I would think of myself on mine decades ago (and emerged happily unscathed..) - but by far the riders I see today are all looking for that elixir they know still exist within themselves.
Yep. I remember an exit to a highway in St. Louis that pointed the way to California....how many times I imagined just getting on the highway and just keep driving...on those depressed days. The fact that it was an option always made me feel liberated and BETTER.
Could it be that the previous generations of overly protective, safety focused, helicoptering parents have created this risk-averse, cocooned new generation? My generation (Baby Boomer) were parent-averse, avoiding parental oversight as much as possible, and parents were too busy to care for the most part. We learned to fend for ourselves, get into and out of trouble, and fight our own fights. I remember my Dad finding me in a fight with another kid and telling me to hurry up and finish it because dinner was waiting. My friends and I played contact sports only occasionally with adult supervision and with only the barest of protective equipment (football helmets were, at best, plastic concussion devices), and we proudly displayed our scars to our girlfriends (but not our mothers). Male toughness was an expected if not honored trait among my peers. It may not have been the best of times nor the best of male development, but it produced men willing to take risks. It seems to me that women are now the risk takers, showing the mental and physical toughness once the domain of men.
I have a slightly different take. We are paying the price of the feminization of America. All the risk avoidance; the mania for safety; the constant harping; is distinctly feminized. And we are much the worse for it. The knitting circle did not venture forth across oceans and untamed continents.
There is something to that view. When I entered the Air Force Academy in 1963, there was a poem prominently displayed over the entrance. It was titled "The Coming American", authored by Sam Walter Foss, and it began, "Bring me men to match my mountains; / Bring me men to match my plains; / Men with empires in their purpose / And new eras in their brains . . ." It was a paeon to masculinity, and an inspiration to young men. It is no longer there at the Academy; removed when women were admitted to the classes of cadets. Now, I fully understand and accept that women have the capability and the right to pursue their dreams in the Air Force or any field of endeavor, but I do not believe that female progress has to denigrate or dismiss male characteristics, nor do I think that women need to imitate those characteristics to succeed. The current concentration on female opportunities and advancement in all fields need not come at the suppression or imitation of men.
It’s also interesting to have the AF presume that the women attending didn’t feel the same sense of power. The poem could have been tweaked just a bit and it would have worked. Instead it was cast out. That’s the problem right there
Yes, the poem's use of "men" could easily be construed as "mankind", as women have obviously been historically instrumental in the pioneering spirit of the nation, accompanying their men into the wilderness, building and defending their homesteads and settlements.
We don’t have to be mountains like men. But women absolutely can move mountains. Why the need to strike down one sex for the other is beyond ridiculous.
Because it was 1963 not 2023. You are talking a 40 year difference. Now all you hear is first women to do this, first black woman, first Hispanic, first Asian, first Muslim, big fucking deal. Same with the nationally of men being the firsts. If a woman or man is qualified pick them. If you're picking for the first to occupy some position, you get what we have today. Box checkers who were hired just to check that box.
As a mother with a successful career, I agree with you
Women don't need to act like men to do well in their job
the current de-masculization going on in Hollywood & Leftist culture is harmful to everyone. we should encourage boys and men to embody strong masculine character traits
I would agree that women--moms mostly I think--push for safety. But it's just not true that risk avoidance is a feminine trait. For one thing, women generally don't knit anymore since industrialization relieved them from having to make clothes by hand. And IME girls and women overwhelmingly seek to travel around the world more. Back when I was a teen going on group trips through programs for kids to live and travel abroad, almost all the participants were girls. As adults, my single girlfriends with means would travel everywhere on their own, including far-flung unusual places as long as women are free to travel solo. For those who are partnered, the guys and husbands also travel because their wives or girlfriends planned the trips. Otherwise they'd never bother to get off their asses and go anywhere.
The constant harping for safety today is not a result of moms harping. It's a symptom of a first world where people live too comfortably and are out of touch with living, and have so few real problems they begin manufacturing problems,
And why is it you talk about "feminization" in such a way to clearly express traits associated with females are negative? I wouldn't disagree that a world tipped overly toward female traits dominant may lead to new problems, but a world tipped overly toward male traits dominant had proven historically to be disastrous for at least the female half of the population, and not so great for many men who died in wars or at hands of the likes of, Hitler, Stalin and Mao. Currently we've got totally masculinized worlds in Iran, Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, and loads of Middle East countries. How much greater are they for it?
Well, you argue that a male dominated world was the cause of all evil. So the answer to that is women in combat? I'm still laughing over that one. And, the mostly Islamic societies that "oppress" women. Who screeches about "Islamophobia" and "tolerance?" You can't have it both ways, much as you might want that.
I do not view feminism as negative. I view the imposition of it on men as negative. There are differences between the sexes that are to be celebrated. There is, however, a crisis among young men today that nobody can dispute. Yet the only thing we see and hear is about female empowerment and how women are oppressed. So, no, boys are not just damaged girls. And masculine traits are not to be bred out of society. Because we do so at our peril.
Feminisms biggest detractor is that is focuses on discounting and wholly devaluing men. They are not binary choices. Instead feminism should be promoting strong women alongside strong men. That’s where it has failed big time.
Ok Bruce, you're jumping to conclusion and putting words in my mouth. Where did I say that "a male dominated world was the cause of all evil"?? I did not say that and I do not think that. I just think that when you say the "feminization of the world" and "we're much worse for it" is inaccurate. Because much worse for whom? And the way you said it implied a negative undertone for a world where women might be dominant.
As for women in combat, I would say if the world is entirely run by women, there would be fewer violent wars, because women deal with conflicts differently. Not necessarily better, but different, So there would be a lot fewer combats. Often when I make this point, some men would trounced out the few historical female national leaders who waged war. But that's counterpoint is a fallacy because these few exceptions were still operating in a male dominant world. They had to play by male dominant rules.
But you won't get dispute from me that men are superior in physical strength and therefore more physically suited to ground combat being the actual fighters. But with other equalizers, such as pushing a button to send a drone, I think a woman can do just fine. BTW, a lot of women served on the ground in ground combat for all practical purposes since WWII, often having to face the same risks. Nonetheless, I'm not going to go into the rabbit hole here on this point. I'm actually on the opposite side of liberals who haven't the slightest clue what combat is like pushing for women in combat.
I don't know why you put scare quotes around "oppress" when talking about Islamic societies oppressing women. You know it's true. You can make sound and valid arguments without using scare quotes which belittle what women in the Middle East are going through. It's ok to have some sympathy. Sympathy can be a masculine trait too.
As for screeching about "Islamophobia" and "tolerance", I don't see it as women doing it. It's the left that's doing it. In fact, screeching about "Islamophobia" and "tolerance" has been one of the most successful ways of shutting down and silencing women speaking up about Islamic societies' denial of basic human rights to women, and also what happened with the human trafficking gang in England. So in my POV, it's left wing pushing it, not women.
As for "feminism", I want to point out that I'm not talking about "feminism". From your earlier post, you were talking about "feminized", which I read as general female traits, or female dominant. That's not the same as "feminism", and I think the distinction is very important. So if we're not talking about feminism but "feminine traits", well I think men and women have a lot more traits in common than not, and there are some traits which are more exhibited in men or women. But even that is not absolute, as the population are all gender nonconforming to some degree. It's just a matter of how much. Following this line of thinking, to me a world more "feminized" doesn't mean individual men have to be more like women. It just means a society that takes more women's approaches to operating and dealing with problems. AND I don't think that's better or worse. I think it is just better in some cases while leads to other issues and problems. I don't think either feminized or masculinized is better or worse. Each will raise its own problems. In real life IME at least, at work, the environments are always best when there's a balance of men and women working.
If you're moving the goalpost to talk about "feminism", then it's a different discussion altogether. Once upon a time, feminism brought women equal rights and made things better for women to live in society in equal terms. "Feminism" today is a shit show and I'd say it's damaging not just boys but girls as well. As for calls for "female empowerment" and "women are oppressed", well if it makes you feel better, those are empty calls. Women's rights are being rolled back to the 1950s now in subjugation to "Trans". The left is dismantling women's rights as we speak.
As for masculine traits being bred of out society, I do agree that politically from the left, what are traditionally perceived as masculine traits are not being valued. A lot of those traits IMO are not really masculine traits, but only perceived to be so because women had been excluded from taking part of the world outside of home. I think these traits are universally human, and many of them we should celebrate and encourage. But they're being devalued because they're associated with being "masculine". And yes I agree with you we're doing so at our peril.
There is a crisis among young men and boys. But let me ask you: why aren't older men stepping up and doing something about it instead of just sitting and blaming women? Why aren't more men taking rein then to show boys positive masculine traits? How to be a good man, a good son, a good husband, and a good father. How to self improve instead if indulging in internet porn and gaming! Men can do that irrespective of women or "feminists" or the left. You can let crazies be crazies and take control and teach boys how to value themselves. Why aren't more men doing that? Instead we have crybaby-in-chief Donald Trump, star athletes who make headlines for misbehaving, and Andrew Tate. Why aren't there more men talking to boys on self improvement besides Jordan Peterson?
And why are young men and boys so fragile that just a because women are doing better in some instances, it's enough to make them curl up in fetal position being damaged? I'm asking this seriously. Girls and young women had lived in a world where men had the upper hand for thousands of years. Women, not just feminine traits, were entirely excluded from society in many parts of the world. Somehow, women and girls just gritted their teeth and bore it and got on until very recent times. Why didn't their trauma debilitate them to the point of giving up like the boys and young men today?
"Why aren't more men taking rein to show boys positive masculine traits? How to be a good man, a good son, a good husband, and a good father. How to self improve instead of indulging in internet porn and gaming! Why aren't there more men talking to boys on self improvement besides Jordan Peterson?"
As a female physician & mom, I agree. Dads/uncles should show young men how to be a man & embody positive traits. Porn & gaming is beyond destructive. Just like social media for girls. I see the harm it does to my young patients. Porn, video games, social media, smartphones, devices for kids/teens----> lead to anxiety, depression, suicide, self harm. they put these kids on very harmful Psych drugs but instead they should just take away the stupid devices. At least 1/2 the kids diagnosed with ADHD would not have it if you took away video games/devices & made sure they got enough sleep at night. I tell parents all day. I hope they listen.
With my own kids, I limit the screen time < 60 minutes per day (and that's a max), they don't have devices & they will not have any devices until they are 14. when they are in Jr High, I will let them have simple phones with No Data that can call/text only.
Just read your response. Thank you for that. I agree fully with your points. Especially on the limitation of tech. There is a beautiful big world out there that both tests and rewards us. Tech is just an illusion. The Matrix writ large and uncomfortably true. Men need to be fathers. Teachers and guides. And take their daughters and sons into that big, beautiful world.
We probably agree on more than that on which we disagree. Although given the propensity for women to support the leftist Democrats in the US, they don't get a pass for that.
Yes, men to need to stand up, be better role models and take role in raising their children. To do that we need a society - and a government - that values and rewards that. Ours does not. We need to stop equating the sexes. To value each for their distinct virtues. In other words, return to normalcy and sanity.
A lot of women would consider voting Republicans if they stop passing insane anti-abortion laws. As long as they do this, they make it impossible for women to vote Republican, and a lot of women would vote Dem not because they support leftist agenda, but to them this is ground zero of women's right and freedom. Whatever you may think of abortion, this is the fact.
If you ask me, I think DeSantis really shot himself in the foot. If he had real galls, he could've brought the laws to reflect the national consensus, and tout FL as the model with the previous 16 weeks legal period. But he caved and showed he's a wimp after all, and he knows it too when signed this latest bill at night with no press and no fanfare. If Republicans would stop being so far right on this issue, a lot of women would finally be free to have choice not just about their own bodies but choice of which party to vote for.
Two women? Seriously? Two women were warmongers so it's enough to deduct how a female dominant world would be just as violent?
Ted Bundy and Jeffrey Dahmer were two of the biggest and most notorious serial killers ever. Are they enough to deduct men are serial killers?
Hillary isn't even a good example. She was a product of the 60s and 70s when women had to prove they could play like boys. She probably carried that mindset with her for the rest of her life.
But to seriously answer your question, the few exceptional women world leaders pursuing war is a reflection of them playing in a male dominant international arena where the rules are set by men. If the overwhelming majority of world leaders are women, there would not be nearly as many wars. I'm not saying the world would be necessarily better. Just less violent.
I’m confused. You argue then men and women are really just alike, only women have been unable to express certain traits because they couldn’t work outside the home.
Then you argue that women are less violent than men and if they were in charge there would be fewer wars, or none at all.
Just pointing out the discrepancy in your argument because I see a lot of people making the same argument and it always baffles me. What reasoning led you to this conclusion?
If you haven’t read The Power you should. It’s about this same subject.
No, I'm no arguing in the absolutes. I think there are many traits that are traditionally associated with masculinity but are general human traits, such as courage and bravery, logical, risk taking, assertiveness, etc. (Risk taking is a nuanced one because we can delve deeper depending on whether we're talking about physical risks or situational risks.) I think these are traits that are not uniquely masculine but are associated with masculinity because women traditionally didn't have roles outside of homes that gave them opportunities or needs to express those traits.
But I also think there are some traits exhibited by more men vs. more women, and these traits by and large stem from biological differences. In regards to war and violence, when we look at violent crime data, the facts are most violent crimes are committed by men. (BTW I'm not saying men as a demographics are violent. I'm only pointing out that crime data shows a much higher percentage of violent criminals to be men rather than women.) There are also data showing males to be more responsive to visual stimulations. That may make them better hunters and combat fighters for example (and video games?)
Does that clarify what I meant? Thanks for the book recommendation. I'll check it out.
"women world leaders pursuing war is a reflection of them playing in a male dominant international arena where the rules are set by men"
Oh please. Given the chance, women can be just as imperialistic as men. I'm sure at some point in your life you've repeated the phrase, "behind every successful man, there is a woman". Well the corollary to that is "behind every warring man is a woman".
I don't think that of you, Bruce! I see your comments on TFP often and quite enjoy them. And from reading our thread I think your original comment was more a generalization pointing to a complaint many of us here have toward liberal "feminism" today. (Frankly I think feminism today is toxic.) I sometimes reply not so much to argue with the OP but to make a case to lurkers and spectators when I feel like there's some comments may be debatable.
Also it's no surprise you and I agree more than we disagree once we go into deeper conversations, or else we wouldn't have ended up here in the first place. There are healthy discussions going on here where people can come to flesh out different perspectives.
Understanding the Order/Chaos, masculine/feminine dichotomy has really helped me frame what is happening (thank you, Dr. Peterson!). Neither are bad, both are necessary for civilization to progress.
Personally, though, I’m more than ready for Order again.
Re: the knitting circle- young female knitters have been some of the most viscous on line starting in 2014... they mobbed non-conformists, ie those who don't march to LEFTISM on instagram creating a ‘purity spiral’ - anything Trump, right wing, patriotic, Christian was attacked. At the largest knitting on-line site Ravelry - knitters displaying any of those traits had their work taken down, they were ostracized, banished and mobbed. Young women today can be very viscous. And an embarassment compared to generations in the past.
Re: the knitting circle- young female knitters were some of the most viscous on-line starting 2014... they mobbed non-conformists (to them, folks who wouldn’t salute leftists positions) on line creating a ‘purity spiral’ - anything Trump, right wing, patriotic, Christian was attacked in that community. At the largest knitting on-line site Ravelry - knitters displaying any of those traits had their work taken down, they were ostracized and banished and mobbed. Young women today can be very viscous.
You've used the word 'feminized' a few times. Quite all encompassing. I personally know women who would blow a man away in sheer aggressiveness.
I just posted above on motorcycles and freedom, this article being about the open road and all, and how I see so few younger riders (of which I used to be one..). But when I do? More often than not, there's long hair popping out from under the helmet, tattoos visible on open skin. Girls, glorious females and displaying every part of themselves, literally and figuratively, as they pop the throttle and pass me on the inside.
We do live in a world of risk avoidance, no question about that. I agree. But I don't think the word 'feminized' describes it.
That's true. My buddy and his wife track their teenagers incessantly. The thing is, it would be easy to beat the tracking by LEAVING YOUR FUCKING PHONE AT HOME! But no modern teenager is willing to go anywhere without their phone, so they happily facilitate their own loss of freedom.
They're smarter than you give them credit for. My nieces are in high school and I'm the "cool" uncle so I know that they all just tell their parents they're going to their friends house, then leave their phones at said friends house, then go do whatever they want.
Potentially true. You could instead be the parent who doesn’t track their kids. Putting trust in them that they can do things on their own is critical. They also can know that if they need to call home if they’re in a bind they will be supported. Bring this back and remove the tracking
“It may not have been the best of times nor the best of male development, but it produced men willing to take risks.”
Since true masculinity is all but forbidden now (and the most celebrated people in western culture are men who decide to become “women”, it’s clearly no accident that men are being eliminated.
At least no one is redefining what it is to be a man. Now, Women are redefined as birthing people so that men who wish to be women are defined as real women.
Did I even just write that? What a world we live in.
Happy to report that my daughter is a throw-back exception. She got her license last month on the first day it was legally possible, worked three jobs to help buy her first car, and I have barely seen her since. She and her boyfriend of nearly a year are talking about taking a road trip this summer.
Her younger brother is twelve. I can feel the magnet of society trying to pull him and his peers inexorably away from work, independence, relationship and adventure, and toward passivity, in the form of a big bean bag, head set and game console.
Your son will do just as great as his sister. Resist the peer pressure to buy him the bean bag, head set & game console. Just say no. Don't do it. Even if "all his friends" have it. Talk to the other moms too. Also something I'm doing:
This is the result of a combination of factors -- including the growth of social media, social services, helicopter parents, along with a society that puts little emphasis on responsibility.
When I received my driver's license at age 16 (way back in the 1970's) , one of the main benefits was that I was able to substantially increase my work hours. 90% of the money I earned at work was put aside to pay for college.
Many of today's high school students expect their parents to pay for college. Or - even better - they can simply take out loans with the expectation that the government will eventually waive their debt.
I'm in my 30s & I started working age 9. My parents told me they weren't going to pay for college & they contributed very little. I saved up money by working thru HS & paid for most of my undergrad. Med school---I took out minimum loans but it was still $300,000. Some of my (dumb) classmates took out max loans in med school & gambled in casinos with that money. I wish I were joking! We would watch them blow tons of money at casinos.
My husband & I paid off that $300,000 loan within 5 yrs. we are very disciplined. We don't spend any money. We have almost paid off the mortgage which is close to $900,000.
With my (almost 3) kids, my husband & I have already decided: they will work starting age 15/16. No allowances. They already do required chores & we dont give them money. they will go to either community college or no college. They can then transfer to a state public university. Unless they manage to get scholarships to go to a private one. We are not paying. We may pay very minimum. We are not co-signing on a bunch of loans. They are not going to go to any leftist brain-washing college. I'm just not going to co-sign loans.
I was on a similar path of today's teens, at 12 I was a chubby asthmatic boy who mostly stayed home. Then one of my friends, excited about Greg LeMond in the Tour de France, dragged me out and we rode our bikes 15 miles from home and turned around. The distances grew, and by 16, we were regularly doing 100-150 mile rides. We both had multiple near fatal crashes and mechanical issues 50+ miles from home, but the strength, both physical and mental, we gained from pushing ourselves so hard payed off. Teens havent changed. Some are always going to be meek, but parents need to let them go out with that one friend with crazy ideas. Today's helicopter parents and overly protective society would never let their teen or preteen jump on a bike and just disappear with no cell phone. They may even be charged with child endangerment. I was 15 and riding 20 miles each way to work from Newburgh to New Paltz every day to a bike shop because they sponsored me in races. That was seen as commitment then, most likely criminal now.
Your story brought to mind Theodore Roosevelt, who was also a young, frail asthmatic boy, who embraced a masculine, outdoor, rugged lifestyle. The rest, as they say, is history. Thanks for sharing it.
Just curious if y’all wore helmets on those early rides. I have a theory that the introduction of helmets in casual cycling led to a drop in cycling. My friends and I rode our bikes everywhere in the early 80s. I don’t see kids doing that anymore.
Helmets and gloves were always a must. Still have my helmet from one of my worst accidents where a car lost control, went into the wrong lane and hit me head on while we were both doing about 50. Completely shattered my helmet on his windshield. Helmets aren't the problem. Kids don't ride bikes to their friends houses anymore because they can just stay at home and play online games with them and chat using VOIP servers like discord. Even video games no longer have split screen multi-player like we used to have in the old classics like Goldeneye. Kids just don't play outside anymore.
Helmets are very important & I've seen way too much trauma & death as a physician. Helmets should be worn. Also don't ride your bike on a road next to a car. You will die. It's a matter of time. Ride the bike on the sidewalk. Just don't be dumb.
Motorcycles are called Donor-cycles for a reason: they are extremely dangerous & lead to frequent death
I should also mention anyone not wearing a seat belt is extremely stupid & deserves what will happen to them. Don't be dumb. Wear a helmet. Wear a seatbelt. Wear protective equipment.
I think some of it is the layout of communities, at least where I live, it is all tract homes and the kids ride around within the community but the main road is 60 MPH.
Yes. Have you seen the old movie “Breaking Away”? It speaks very much to the situation described in the article. I think author Rob Henderson would like it as well since it’s about working class kids, their obstacles and triumphs.
Yeah, I remember loving the movie as a teen, haven't seen it in years. May have to check to see if it's on any of the streaming services to remember old times...
I am a 68 years old widow. Just got back from a nearly 2000 mile car trip through our beautiful Southeastern region. At the Tennessee Welcome Center on the Tennessee river, south of Chattanooga, I had one of those near tears gasps of "how lucky I am to live in this country where we can drive from one place to another with being carded and see things like this." I get the same feeling when I drive to Maine or Ohio. It is a wonderful feeling to be traveling in a car listening to Elvis and loving our America.
🙌 I’d driven from New Jersey to Washington twice by the time I was 22. And so many trips in between. America is so beautiful, vast, and there is nothing better than a road trip. My family and I RV and are getting so excited for our summer trip. (Though it’s hard to get very far given how South we are in Texas. 🙄)
yes, I used to drive to Canada by myself when I was still in high school. a 500 mile trip to the family cabin. The Queen Elizabeth Way in Toronto was no joke.
That's the only one of the generalizations in this article that fits him. He works two jobs (and enjoys both), has plenty of friends, goes on trips, and generally seems to be living his life in an adventuresome but responsible fashion. 😀
I'm not sure who developed the equation "cars = FREEDOM," but it's an excellent example of supplier-induced demand.
Having cars is a very American thing. Most people in the world don't own cars because their geography and transportation systems don't require cars. But I get the point the author is making. It's less about driving than risk taking.
Not a proxy, an example. 50 years ago it wasn't considered an outsized risk as much as a rite of passage. Now it is considered a risky undertaking, especially when viewed against a backdrop of safety-ism. And kids think self-driving cars and Uber make the whole thing unnecessary to get them wherever they want to go. That misses the point of being free to go wherever, whenever.
I guess the kids I know are very different from the kids a lot of the people on the Free Press message boards know. They take risks from time to time–intelligent risks. And some of them aren't interested in driving. 😀
And if the 2 jobs were 20 miles away, there was no public transportation, and it was 20 below zero???? To the majority of the country, cars DO equal freedom. I think people in major cities live in a bubble and don't recognize the reality of most of the country.
Commuting by car did not become a big thing in the U.S. until the mid-20th century. In fact, many mid-sized cities dismantled perfectly functional public transportation systems because gas was so cheap, and the idea that gas was not an endlessly renewable resource or might become the focal bargaining chip for endless geopolitical conflicts seemed completely alien.
Cars _may_ equal short-term freedom for numerous Americans trapped in an endless cycle of paycheck-to-paycheck commuting. But personally, I don't see being held hostage to soaring gasoline prices and OPEC toadying as any kind of long-term freedom.
Obviously, mileage varies on that one. 😀. (Pun intentional.)
With the amount of environmental degradation and pollution and slave labor that goes into making an EV currently, I will never buy an EV.
They are slowly working on getting more mining/processing done in Canada & Australia, though that will take time. If they are able to do it, and make an EV without all the horrible pollution & slave labor, then at that point, I'll consider it
Hey, _I_ have a car! I live in the country; I couldn't function without a car. Upstate New York, since you're interested. 😀
My youngest son also lives in upstate New York but in a small, university-dominated city. Public transportation system is not great; I think he mostly uses it during the winter since it snows quite a bit there. Most of the time, he bikes.
We should not be beholden to OPEC & we should increase domestic energy production. Wall St, as usual, is causing problems b/c they only care about profits for themselves rather than lowering gas prices for everyone:
“Oil and gas companies do not want to drill more,” said Pavel Molchanov, an analyst. “They are under pressure from Wall St to pay more dividends, to do more share buybacks instead of the proverbial ‘drill baby drill,’ which is the way they would have done things 10 years ago. Corporate strategy has fundamentally changed.”
When I went to high-school in the late 60s’ “cars=FREEDOM” was simply our reality. Shortly after my friend got his driver’s license, in 1969 we borrowed his parents’ Volkwagen bus and drove from the South Bay up to the Oakland coliseum to hear the Rolling Stones. I guess kids can now listen to that concert on their iphone.
Yeah, I guess kids now just have a lot more options. When I was a kid you had to drive around in a car to have a life; (a car with an 8 track cassette player). It was a very different world. I remember when they announced that the last BART station was going to be in Fremont, CA. But that was built long after I graduated.
Often, he goes to what I would call Destination Concerts. 😀
Like he'll train down to the Big City (which hereabouts is NYC) and then fly to wherever the bands are that he's interested in hearing for a festival event.
My wife and I recently flew to London for the Michael Buble concert! Which is so surreal for me, since when I was a little boy I remember that my Danish Grandma still made her own soap from saved fat drippings. It’s a very different world now.
I will say that arguing that your son doesn’t need a car because he take an airplane to concerts, complicates your “supplier-induced demand” argument a little bit 😊.
But I don't think I was arguing that he doesn't "need" a car. Merely that he doesn't drive but doesn't seem to fit any of the other stereotypes in this article.
And I can assure you I was NOT an over-protective "bubble" parent! 😀 I drive; my other two sons drive; but my youngest does not—and doesn't seem to be suffering in terms of initiative, resilience, or quality of life.
Cars...FFS, encourage getting places by BICYCLE. Bikes are a machine for liberation. Yeah, sure, lots of people think 'many deaths by bike' but the stats show otherwise. I'm 61 years old, been riding my bike most days for 50 years - in the northeast, the first 25 in NYC and Boston, since then, in rural New England. My kids, i 'forced' them to ride their bikes growing up, and now in their 20s, they're strong as f*ck, used to weather, can take care of themselves....being on a bicycle was a big piece of their foundation. Less cars, more bikes; less 'new technology'; more human technology.
I agree that I think if kids were allowed to bike freely all over town, then it wouldn’t be as scary to do it in a car later on. It was my first taste of freedom as a kid and where I learned to solve problems when they popped up. I let my kids do this and my oldest who loves to photograph trains and planes does bike all over to capture images of trains at least. It’s not feasible for him to bike to the airport though, but he could get there by public transportation easily enough which I will let him do on his this summer (if only to experience the process of having to depend on public transport and it’s cost).
You're probably right. We "free-ranged" over a radius of many miles pre-driving age (during the sixties). "Be back by dinner time" was the only admonition.
Yes! Summer holidays: up in the morning, fixed your own breakfast, threw on some clothes (no phone, no cash), ran outside, grabbed the bike (which lay on the lawn all night), rang your friend's doorbell, and headed out for a day of adventure and exploration. The only rule: be home by suppertime.
Agree. Kids no longer are allowed to bike anywhere alone. So, kids aren't that into biking. And that refers to those whose patents bother to teach them how. I was horrified when I learned my sister and husband did not teach their kids to ride bikes. They made up a zillion excuses. For them, it was pure laziness. They justified not doing it claiming fear of strangers...but the reality was they were too immersed online to get off their behinds and teach their kids.
Neither child knows how to drive today and show no desire . Both stayed home to go to college. It is a sin, IMO. They have not yet lived at all. They do not know how, either. Both have taken jobs in the local town and still live at home. They could do better elsewhere but they are, of course, afraid to leave Mom and Dad.
Many municipalities allow bikes on public transit. NYC did even in the 70s when it was 'against the law'; and since then, big changes all over. If yr in a place w an airport, chances are some to the airport buses allow bikes on / on the front bike rack even. Esp because of labor force needed at airports; pay is low, so if yr a hustler w a bike...you bike to the bus to the airport. It's a way for kids to mix with labor also, and see just what we run on...cheap labor. Bikes = libration, can't say it enough (also, if there ISNT a bike friendly bus to the airport, there are bike buses to within biking distance OF the airport. Which is how i discovered lots of parts of Queens. Which to this day, are still invisible; like Brigadoon or any other mythic hidden place.
I love bike riding and always have. I remember that feeling of freedom when I first learned how to do it. Amazing!
I also remember when I turned eleven or twelve and I was allowed to ride to the strip mall near our neighborhood. I’d go to the pizza place and get one slice and a root beer. I felt like a real adult.
Funny, i feel the same way when i see people encased in cars which haven't really changed all that much since the mid 1900s!...cars COULD be way smaller, lighter, stronger, quicker longer lasting....made w space frames, carbon fiber, smaller form factor etc. Instead....a misapplication of best design practices; an extra application of 'marketing'. There's a great bunch of work by Armory Lovins around how to make better design choices around car design and house design too. But! instead, we choose phony opulence. I think about this often when i am zipping by cars stuck in traffic.
Ha! had to look up 'World Economic Forum'. Nope - 'space frame' = much stronger than current typical car design. Space frames are far safer than current SUV design. And check out 'death per mile' rates for bicycle mile VS car mile, though of course in the intersection between a car and a bike, it's curtains for the latter. There are many different ways to be in the world; living in fear - death trap - and not using intelligent technology - that's assuming the corporatist POV that the WEF 'great idea' comment WANTS you to take. When you can be put into a box, for marketing, well then, you're easy to separate from your cash. When one lives outside the constraints of conventional life design - which a bicycle reminds one to do EVERY DAY - one is free.
Agreed. Our daughters are 26, 23 & 21 and all 3 had jobs at 16 and paid at least half for their 1st cars at 16. They weren’t happy about it at first but now claim both those things with pride & satisfaction. Adults have to have the courage to have expectations based on clear & intimate knowledge of what their children are capable of. The kids aren’t the only ones being lazy IMO.
I'm increasingly interested in the concept of a masculine presence infusing the joy of risk into the hormonal atmosphere. I just realized that it was my father who taught me how to swim, tie my shoes, ride a bicycle, do math (well not really, but he tried) jump off the high diving board, fly kites, not cry in the backseat of a plane he was flying, make bank deposits and write checks, roller skate, ice skate and, of course, supplement my high school driving course. And last but not least, it was my father who showed me how to buy a car and make the monthly payments.
But time and time again, when I hear of a kid failing to launch, they live at home with their MOM. They grew up with a single mother.
And in this matriarchal society, the following statement regarding "more permissive" sexual norms does not ring true:
"Alongside the decline in teen driving and employment, study after study shows that young people are having less sex, even as sexual norms have grown more permissive. The decline has been particularly pronounced among men, with almost 30 percent of those under thirty reportedly not having sex even once in the past year, a figure that tripled between 2008 and 2018."
It's the matriarchy that's driving the transgender craze of slicing off kids' genitals. It's the matriarchy that has kids talking about themselves through a therapeutic lens. It's the matriarchy that renders them anxious and insecure, because their mothers are. This is not a more sexually permissive society -- certainly NOT! When kids feel "traumatized" by a "sexual assault" that wasn't more than, say, a forced kiss that their predecessors would have laughed off!
The only thing about gender as a social construct is the idea of gender as a social construct. Men bring the T into the house, and it's the T that encourages kids to feel safe enough to take risks. It's hilarious to think that the feminists blamed men for "keeping women in the home" when women dominating discourse is now keeping EVERYONE in the home!
I live in NJ and have four sons ages: 21, 20, 18, and 16. Nobody is on meds. Nobody goes to a shrink. Average students. My 21 year old decided to skip college and works in sales in Florida. My 20 year old also didn't go to college and is in sales in Oregon. My 18 year old is a busser at a local restaurant and has worked since he was 15. He will be going to work with his brother for the summer in Oregon and then community college. My 16 year old has been working since he was 14 as a busser and also in fast food. He has 8k saved up for a car. You need to be 17 to drive in NJ. He said he wants his own car so we can't tell him what to do and when he can and can't use the car. Do I see the kids that are described in the article? Not in their friend groups, but I know they exist. I have nothing against ride share or public transportation, but at a certain point you need a car.
They still go to parties, hang in the park and drink, and push the boundaries like when I was a kid.
Sex? I'm the mom, so I don't want to ask. ewwww...... But I've seen hickies on their necks and condoms hidden in their room. I don't see as many relationships as I remember in high school. It seems to be a bit more of a hookup culture.
My kids are all independent. Nature? Nurture? Who knows. Not that they're older they will tell me that we're much less restrictive than their friends' parents. I DO notice that my youngest is the most independent and the most rebellious. He gets in trouble in school a LOT and it's the things that would have been a slap on the wrist when I was in high school.
The trend is disturbing, but I grateful that we have average, normal and well-adjusted boys. Knock wood.
This piece is, in my opinion, very accurate. Safety-ism is rampant, and it is not preparing our youth to take the risks that eventually result in success. Instead, nestled within their parental-protection cocoons and absorbed in screen time, they makes their parents safe from allegations of child endangerment, and their friends reinforce the need to protect themselves from all those predators in the news, and all those murderous racist misogynist paternalistic homophobic psychopaths can be held at bay.
In my life, the greatest gains came from the greatest chances I took. I partially failed once, but recovered to make a lot of money from that partial failure, just in a different way than I originally expected. I too was grossly eager to get my first car. It meant freedom and an enormous new world of adventure to me. I remember the moment exactly - I literally jumped for joy. And that effort and risk made my life, at times absolutely exhilarating. I wouldn’t trade that excitement for anything else.
Lockdowns killed leaving. Why leave when there's nowhere to go?
Now we have a generation trained to stay at home, to wait until given permission to smile, to interact, to even show their face -
one false move, and a horde of angry online demons descends to publicly shame the uncompliant.
These are the fruits of oppression; to rage against the machine only when the machine allows it, and to go only where one is told to go...
who will teach them to fight back, and break free?
"one false move, and a horde of angry online demons descends to publicly shame the uncompliant."
The key to liberation.
Unplug. There is a beautiful life out there.
Live it.
Driving certainly was a rite of passage when I was growing up. In our high school, we used to have Wednesday afternoons off so we would all pile into cars, along with a case or two of beer and head to Washington Crossing state park for an afternoon of frivolity. There was also the opportunity for adventure, complete with the dangers that sometimes accompany it.
On one winter day, me and three friends decided to go for a drive in my 67 Plymouth Barricuda, after a fresh snow on tires with minimal tread . All was going well until we came upon a bridge crossing just wide enough for two cars. There was a fair decline leading to the bridge and just as I entered it I saw a car entering from the other side, facing similar conditions. I was traveling faster than I should have been. If I tried to brake there’s no doubt I would have ended up sideways and at best ping- ponged off the sides of the bridge and at worst, crash through it and into the river below. All I could do was try and keep the car straight and in my lane while hoping the other guy could do the same. As we approached there was dead silence, four pounding hearts notwithstanding. One small error by either of us would have resulted in bent metal and a lot of explaining to my parents. Thankfully he kept his head, and we passed without incident. There isn’t a video game that could inspire the rush of fear, hope, and empowerment we all experienced at that moment. I’ve had other such moments in my life. I suspect that one did much to prepare me for the rest of them.
Parents thought a curfew would keep their daughter from getting into trouble. Trouble could be found after school, long before dark! As regards the back seat of cars, a young girl was safer on a motorcycle! I remember with fondness my days as a carhop, carrying milkshakes and burgers to cars. I met more boys. ... The late sixties and early seventies were the very best!
OMG, so true! All my friends knew how to sneak into my house, and "sleepover" meant sneaking out. There were parties. no damage, just fun.
Kids these days don't take risks. And as a consequence they have no idea what they are capable of, and what they can get away with.
The consequence to extreme and prolonged safetyism.
We live in a different world now. When I grew up there was no internet or cable tv. There were no supervised after school activities. The area I lived was still pretty undeveloped so for the most part, we had to devise activities to amuse ourselves. Sometimes that meant playing “chicken” on a frozen pond to see who could skate closest to the thin ice without falling through. Sometimes it meant constructing ramps and jumping them on our bikes. I can say from experience that nothing focuses ones mind so acutely as making a landing without scraping face first across the dirt or landing crotch first on the bike’s cross bar. As I entered my teen years the risks we undertook increased, like fashioning a toboggan out of a piece of discarded corrugated tin with my father, attaching it to the back of his station wagon with a piece of rope and speeding through a snow-covered peach orchard. Maybe the most exhilarating activity was piling onto a chopped, V-8 powered Ford station wagon my uncle fashioned into a sort of dune buggy. Its sole passenger features consisted of a bench seat and a sheet of plywood over the gas tank. Seat belts and handles weren’t included. My cousin, who was a bit older, usually drove and he seemed obsessed with trying to throw us all off with sudden, high-speed turns. The most memorable attempt involved getting the buggy onto two wheels.
Unfortunately, the pond we used to skate on has been allowed to silt in because heaven forbid, someone might drown. The makeshift ramps we used to construct have been replaced with skate parks and governed by safety rules promulgated by personal injury lawyers and insurance underwriters. The farms we used to slide across and traverse on two wheels are now county parks where such activities have been replaced with walking paths, bird watching stations and dog parks. I’m not sure how our youth's reaction to the restrictions and reduced opportunities for free expression will play out. I suspect the teenage mobs that have recently rampaged downtown Chicago may provide a clue.
Sometimes life is beautiful. Sometimes it is ugly. Sometimes it is hard and sometimes it is easy. But it is real.
Avoid anonymous dystopians on the internet. They will bring you down if you take them seriously.
Yep. "Unplug"? Well, at least step back.
As into internet discussions posters here on the Free Press are, I suspect that most have them have a good sense of being plugged-in while remaining relatively well attached to reality.
They’ve become the submissive bed wetting basket cases our dependency groomers in DC wish them to be. Living, iPhone in hand, with a long list of existential threats...racism, hate speech, transphobia, climate change, permanent COVID, unsafe spaces, driving, abortion access, intimacy with an actual human, competition, taking tests, white supremacy, inequity, FOMO, making simple decisions...is just too much to bear for our sensitive young adults in this cruel world of ours. Failing to understand that those avidly stoking fears were to be ignored is one of the many mistakes they’ll regret later on.
But... but... there might be somebody somewhere who owns a gun!
/sarcasm
How did I forget the guns??? 😖
Yip there just might be
And you might meet that someone in a place you didn't expect.
Fantastic comment - you nailed it. It’s up to us to teach them to break free. The root of everything is fear and free speech. If they’re too afraid to express themselves, they won’t drive, date, live, etc. I wrote an open letter to the leaders of Substack about protecting free speech - will The Free Press and its brilliant readers co sign it? https://substack.com/profile/64905469-yuri-bezmenov/note/c-14787883
Canada's dangerous current government is poised to pass Bill C-11 to censor the Internet. This group of fools argues that the bill will protect Canadian content in the era of online streaming, but that is a ruse. It will censor online content -- including criticism of their policies -- and close the door to global markets.
Justin Trudea is a lunatic as are the Clintons, the Obamas, Jeff Bizos, and the whole Biden administration, is a scam, if we leave the situation as it is we doomed to hell, we need to take our lives back today how I have no idea maybe we all just go back to basics of Flag,Family and country we have to start somewhere.
“The root of everything is fear and free speech.”
True, but other than embedding that in our constitution and building the most successful advanced society in the history of mankind around free speech, no fear, and the rights of the individual; what can be done? If 50% of the population thinks free speech and individual rights are “hate speech” and “systemic racism/ eco-terrorism “ then we are done. Put a fork in us. We had a good run though!
I'm not convinced that anywhere near 50% of people believe that. We're just letting a loud and motivated minority tell us all what to do. I know I have nothing but anecdotal evidence of this, but it is how I feel...or perhaps HAVE to feel so I don't lose all hope.
I hear you, Kevin. Unfortunately, my “evidence” is
actual polling data, election results, and objective reality. Anecdotally I’d wager that 50% is being conservative and that it’s much higher.
But what do I know? I live in a state that has legalized drugs and criminal behavior, closed churches and gymnasiums, arrested people for organizing and protesting, forced children to take experimental drugs, encourages illegal immigration on an unprecedented scale, and just banned gas powered cars…
I have hope too, but it’s starting to turn to anger. Another pop-culture phrase from the 1980’s: “You won’t like me when I’m angry”
I wondered if you were lumping all people who voted a specific way. And that is why I don't totally buy it. Plenty of people on either side of the political divide don't 100% agree with everything their side does. People vote the way they do for lots of reasons. And sometimes they do it without fully understanding what they voted for. I would put money down that plenty of people will leave an area because their own politicians 'ruined' it, and then go to a new place and vote for the same things that screwed up the place they just left.
My suspicion is that many people are more moderate in general, but they may have a couple of issues that end up pulling them to one side or the other. And at times a political movement may take a rather radical position on a topic, but not everyone who ends up voting for that movement necessarily agrees with it. Or in some cases even knows for certain that is what they just voted for. Too many people get their info from narrow (or even faulty) sources. And politicians do a great job or misrepresenting themselves.
On top of that, both parties have become opposites as far as their platforms. If one is for something the other will be against it. So if you have a item that is super important to you, say, abortion, you only have 1 party to vote for that supports your view. And voting for them means you get ALL of the other things as well, like it or not.
All of that is why I wish we had more than 2 parties (or NO parties).
1st off, thank you for your reply. I can see you think about things more than skin deep.
I am inclined to agree with you but I increasingly am having difficulty defending a single position put forth by the Democrat party. There are some positions held by the Republican Party that I disagree with, but at least I can have intelligent civil discussions with conservatives I disagree with. Not so with Leftists and Democrats these days.
I have more than one issue that is a priority to me for sure. I used to be a liberal democrat, you know, pro-democracy, constitution, equal justice under the law, American exceptionalism, free speech, anti-war, anti-racism/sexism/homophobia, pro-labor, strong middle class, LIFE, liberty, and “you know the thing!” 🤪…blah blah blah
I can no longer find a single one of those core issues that the left leaning Democrat party defends or isn’t outright destroying in name and deed.
Can you? If so, please elaborate. I won’t be snarky or bite. I just really can not truthfully find an issue that I agree with the Democrats on. Not one.
Am I brainwashed or something? Did they really just promote racism, identity politics, start a world war, keep our kids out of school for over 2 years, promote one race of people over another, promote censorship of free speech, put razor wire up around our Capital, force children to take experimental drugs, burn down cities and attack police nationwide, hold political prisoners in gulags, and now attempt to have their political opponents (and church goers, people who post memes, and any other people they disagree with) arrested and thrown in prison?
I’m sorry, there is no more middle ground here for me to “reach out” to. They, the Democrat party, are literally the opposite of everything I have ever learned to love and respect about the USA.
Please convince me I’m wrong. But do it before the Democrats ban/cancel/censor us from being able to discuss it here on Substack.
Right. I live a blue state.
I know many people who vote Democrat, who think they are Democrat, who think they know what they are voting for, but they really have no idea. Some of these people care a lot about abortion. They also get crazy news sent to them. Like "GOP is trying to ban all books"
You must be from california!
I’m “from” Virginia, I just live in California.
I remember one of my dad’s favorite insults to people who proudly claimed they were from California…He would say “Congratulations! That’s a good place …to be from!” 😂
Washington State, right?
Haha no, it’s California. But my brother lived in Kent. He was a big fan until apparently he couldn’t take it anymore and moved to Portland. Talk about “out of the frying pan into the fire” 😂
"Up to us"?? What does that mean? Please be specific.
It means "we should be the change we wish to see in the world". It means "somebody should do something, and we are somebody". It means " think globally, act locally". It means "if not us, who; if now, when?"...
These quotes are more than mindless koans - these statements are the wisdom of centuries, the empowerment of the individual to change the world. But the System is teaching learned helplessness against itself and empowerment only through the itself. We must take back our own power, and recognise our ability to change what we can where we can.
We start by meeting Humans face to face whenever possible, outside the constraints of the internet. Build the local wetware network -
Community of Humanity.
<i>It means "we should be the change we wish to see in the world". It means "somebody should do something, and we are somebody". It means " think globally, act locally". It means "if not us, who; if now, when?"...</i>
Those are all bumper stickers.
I want you to lay out the plan for instructing a generation of slackers how to be engaged with the world, when their parents have already raised them to be exactly that way and when the Big Tech they worship WANTS them to stay brain dead. Because the "learned helplessness" of which you speak is fueled in part by bumper stickers.
So I want to hear the details. You know, like a business plan. How do individuals without control over other individuals, who do not want to be influenced by other than "influencers (in the worst possible way)" & who suffer from the disease of woke hive mind, brain death, etc., impart their wisdom of centuries which presumably is now, what, genetically expressed? I live my life with as much interaction as I can, but the last time I had a great interaction with someone, there was not a single horde of teenagers nearby to witness it. I mean, do I contact high schools & do my interacting as a guest lecturer? No bumper stickers, please. I already do meet humans face to face whenever possible, but so far it hasn't made a dent & I do have a day job.
I don't mean to be snippy here, but words are the cheapest things out there.
First, let me say it sounds like you are really trying to be engaged, and secondly, that you frustrated by it. That's how I KNOW you are genuinely involved. There is a cost when we try to interact - it wears down the soul when we work hard and it seems to make no difference. So thank you for trying, even when no one sees.
Next, yes, those sayings ARE 'bumperstickers'. Thats why I chose them. They are wise words, familiar to us, but we no longer recognise them, because they have been spoken without action. That leads us to dismiss them. We have lost their power, because we have abused them.
Finally I'm genuinely honored you think that I would have the plan to fix this.
My plan starts with me.
1) I recognise my own Power to change the world, even when no one else does.
- I must fight against my own learned helplessness. I DO make a difference.
2) My Gift is my Power. I must find my Gift, and give it.
- I write. Some people cook. Others teach, or hammer nails. What is your gift? Give it.
3) I will find the Ones to whom I will give my Gift.
-Online and off, Interaction is limited in this world, so I must find my forum. The mundane is frequently overlooked. The grocery store, church, work, home; I must offer my gift freely, even if it is just a smile, and don't stop giving just because of haters.
4) I will see the Human behind the interface.
-Online or off, People behind the barriers need to know they are valued. My support and encouragement mean a great deal. and the mssage I wish to share is connected to that support.
5) I will recognise the Opportunity when it comes.
-Look for the Hidden Path, the moment when the door opens.
6) I will know my Message and speak it boldly.
-What do I need to say? How can I say it in love? Write it down and work it in.
7) I will refresh my Spirit
-Encountering people and giving my best requires me to take care of me.
8) Try again.
-I won't give up.
9) I will Fight until the Battle is won or done.
-Let the Battle end, not because I quit, but because I fought until I won, or could fight no more.
10) I will give the encounter to God, and leave it in His Hands.
-When it is over, I ask if I did all I could do. If I didn't, I ask forgiveness and try harder. If I did all I could do, then I give it to God, and let the planted seed bloom under His care.
That is my plan for me. I'm sure it sounds trite, but they are words of my Father...
words are cheap only to those who don't value them. These words are more precious to me than Gold, because I know what they meant to the One who taught me.
Keep Fighting the Good Fight.
I'm not "trying to be engaged." I am just living my life in the way that is suited to my demeanor and personality. So you don't need to "thank" me, any more than you need to thank me for, I don't know. "Trying to have hazel eyes," which I already do. I don't actually care what you think of how I live my life or how grateful you are for it.
And I'm not frustrated by my or anyone else's degree of engagement, which they have a right to choose. I'm frustrated by the airy-fairy nature of your post. And believe me when I tell you that I've airy-fairied with the best of them, having hitchhiked to many Rainbow Gatherings in the 80s where I ran around naked & believed completely in everything. So I recognize hippy when I see it.
I do dismiss those bumper stickers because reading them accomplishes nothing. They are a thing we can say that allows us & others to think we are making some kind of difference, but in the end it's filler. Chaff. Feelz to make us think we are accomplishing things, like those posts people put on social media, "like if you hate animal cruelty." Sure. And?? A picture of an abused animal gets a gazillion likes & presumably is still being abused.
Giving smiles is all well & good, but the degree by which first-world smiles make the lives of starving 3rd-world children better is less than negligible. I mean, your "power to change the world." Change it how, and in what way, and in what way, and in what way? What's the business plan? Are you physically solving the problem or giving money to people who can?
Sorry, but your second post is just a bumper sticker that requires the side of a bus, same as the other stuff only more. I don't have a lot of patience for it.
Last: Koans are anything but mindless. In fact they're the complete opposite.
Lockdowns haven't been good, but I spent spring of 2020 in my car, because gas was $2.00 a gallon, exploring various remote rural areas precisely because I didn't want to get infected.
My wife and I had a similar reaction. We spent a month in 2021 driving small highways from Washington State to North Carolina and and back, staying in small towns we didn't know anything about, trying to learn more about this country now.
"See the USA in your Chevrolet" used to be a thing. To a lot of drivers now, the interstate territory between big cities is the driving equivalent of flyover country. Never venture farther off the main highway farther than necessary to find gas and a double latte.
The most interesting and surprising communities seemed to be in "flyover country".
I've noticed this as well, but it has benefits for those unafraid of small town, backcountry America. I hesitate to advertise this "hack" because I wouldn't want to ruin it, but the truth is that most urbanites wouldn't pay attention anyway.
When we evacuated the Tampa Bay area for Hurricane Irma, we left at 3 am and took the back roads north, avoiding the slowly moving parking lot of I-75 at all costs (despite evil Google maps constantly trying to direct us back to the freeway). My son's friend's family left at almost the exact same time, but took the freeway. Both kids had Instagram or Snapchat (not sure which one), which has a tracking feature so users can tell where their online buddies are, setting up an unplanned but very illuminating experiment.
Well, by 8:30 am, we were breakfasting at a Waffle House in south Georgia while they were somewhere around Ocala. We were pulling into our hotel in Rome, northwest of Atlanta, when they finally crossed the state line into Georgia.
Because of this, I think the horror classic "Deliverance" should be broadcast constantly throughout Florida prior to and during hurricane season. Keep all those urbanites scared stiff of hillbillies and other rural folk so that they stay on the interstates and leave the backroads uncongested for my convenient and unobstructed travel.
I wonder if one remedy for everything happening now would be more road trips. Driving through vastly different parts of the country and seeing that most people, no matter where, are largely just People might make folks feel less like they are constantly under attack from those unknown people out there.
If nothing else, it might help us all have a little more context about the world we live in instead of assuming our bubbles are the sum total of reality
Road trips are a blast. When my sons moved out, I worried how my husband and I would do together. We went on a road trip from San Diego to Dallas, to Memphis, to St. Louis, to Bozeman, and back to San Diego. It was so much fun and renewed both of us. along the way we stopped to see places that were along the way, Elvis' house, the ducks at the Peabody Hotel, the Arch, Mt. Rushmore, and more. If you can, go!
No reason to.
I especially enjoyed rural areas because they were much more likely to be sane and non-hysterical regarding things like masking, one-way grocery store isles (remember that comedy?), etc.
But gas was $2 John then we got Biden. What were we all thinking when we apparently voted this man in. It’s a disaster
The person who removes the phone from their child’s feeble hand will be firing the first shot in that fight!
Parents!!!!
Who? Certainly not their parents. I made a point of not having kids, so I don't plan to instruct a lost generation, which IMHO cannot be saved. The simple answer is: "no one."
What was the name of that band? Asleep at the Wheel? Their big album was titled: "Comin' Right At Ya".
Didn't you say your daughter had some drama with pronouns in college?
I don't have a daughter, & if I did, her pronouns would be up for discussion only by imbeciles.
😂😂
Themselves.
A couple even pull it off.
This predates lockdowns by a more than decade at least, RH.
This article is basically describing reality, as the writer and we once knew it, versus online. And reality is losing. Social media has allowed an entire generation to live, meet people, love (or a version thereof..), learn (or a version thereof), be entertained, join virtual worlds, play games, get upset, and have sex in the mundane ubiquity of basements, darkened rooms and as they wait in line for a smoothie. It is the new conformity, as you alluded to.
The real world is losing, and we have AI to look forward to in taking the artificial to a whole other level. Gen Z is already screwed, but what about the five years olds on iphones now?
Doomed..
Yes, the ground work was laid long before Lockdown, or it could not have worked. We must keep trying, though. We see what is happening. We have power to do something about it...
if I do nothing, I too succumb to the message of powerlessness. I refuse to be another victim of the war against Humanity.
Lol.
The lockdowns are recent history that lasted two years. This has been going on a long time. I started to see it with my son’s friends. He turns 30 next month. I noted in an earlier response, driving is a responsibility, and we took that off kids’ To Do lists long ago.
Agreed completely on this point - the destruction of adulthood has been an ongoing war of attrition, over at least the last decade. Seeing it come to fruition with the lockdowns has been mindboggling.
These are the fruits of oppression; to rage against the machine only when the machine allows it, and to go only where one is told to go...who will teach them to fight back, and break free?
Are the riots on Chicago's magnificent mile good? It is the rage of young men fighting back and breaking free of society's rules, but it seems unsupportable rather than praise worthy.
It is not fighting back when one is fighting FOR - that is compliance, to do what one is told to do, to do what one is allowed. They were told to do this - and they did. Through social media, high societal approval and propaganda, these rioters have been explicity told to rage in that place and time.
-They were instructed by social media post to riot at that time and place
-Little enforcement was made, and police are being defunded
-The Mayor of Chicago condemns those who criticise the riots - NOT the rioters: "It is not constructive to demonize youth who have otherwise been starved of opportunities in their own communities.”
These youth were starved BY their communities, then fed lies in its place. They are only allowed to rage where the machine tells them to rage. They were not allowed to go to church during lockdowns, not allowed to visit loved ones...
but they WERE allowed to riot.
They rage FOR the machine.
No, to the whole " the machine" idea. Not a believer in an overarching conspiracy, plot, or machine. Find it frightening that people believe that their actions are controlled by another and they have no ability to select their destiny.
Precisely. Why do they believe that?
Being "powerless" against "the machine" removes responsibility for any action. Actions have rewards and consequences intended and unintended. This is not deny larger factors like the country one is born in or your childhood, but within one's realm there is some control.
Refusing to be an eternal Victim is the first step to Freedom. Freedom takes responsibility, because it acknowledges autonomy of action. "I choose to take this action" is a declaration of independence; "Look what you made me do" is an Abuser wearing the mantle of Victimhood.
The constant “you’re killing the planet” moniker doesn’t help either. And with an Administration bent on making the US drive electric cars it will get worse. They are more expensive, the environmental cost to produce them is astronomical. Why would an Administration push to electrify a nation with less dense energy, requiring raw materials that rape the Congo. All in contrast to the facts and worse, common sense. Why must we change over to vehicles powered by batteries? I live in a cold environment where a battery will not perform when it is cold outside and in ten years will still not perform. The answer is simple; Government doesn’t want citizens mobile anymore.
We already have lived through the best the US could provide. We are watching the slow demise.
The elites will be mobile.
Good comment though - I was beginning to think I was the only one that couldn’t figure out why anyone would buy an electric car other than to virtue signal. Totally impractical if you live in a cold climate or need a car to drive long distances to visit family once or twice a year.
Most families have more than one car. I can completely see having an electric car for day-to-day use such as going to the store, running errands, etc. and then a gas powered car for the longer drives.
Unfortunately, many families will have to keep food on the table & heat in the house before they can spend $30K on a Prius.
They aren't comfortable either.
Agreed, an EV is fine if you can also have a real car. In fact any piece of junk is fine as long as you can also have a good version. The problem is that the government is mandating a date when you will no longer be able to buy the food version. That’s how you know EVs are inferior. No one had to mandate the transition away from horses, because people actually wanted it. No one set a sunset date for film cameras, digital just got too good and easy to pass up. No one wants EVs because they are worse in 9 out of 10 ways so they have to force us.
Yes, it is so relaxing lying in bed each night, wondering if your car charger is going to catch fire...but hey, climate change...
No not CC rather human control!
But that is not the vision…it’s total electric, with no gas powered autos…why not mandate hybrids, why such a draconian vision, especially since there is no way to have China, India, et al comply
With the current mining & processing conditions, it is much more environmentally degrading & polluting to drive an EV.
I will not buy an EV until all mining & processing is done in an environmentally responsible way & by a well-paid labor force.
The current administration won’t let you have a gas car. That’s the point they want us in a 3 miles radius hope you’re a good Walker!
I have to respectfully disagree.
I own an electric car and could not be happier with it. It seems a lot of the animosity is political in nature and if we're throwing stones at companies/industries that have received bailouts/kickbacks/subsidies, we're going to run out of rocks (incidentally, the tax rebate is quite literally the one instance I have received a special largess from the gov't and was not the determining factor in my purchase).
Obviously individual circumstances change the analysis (I live in a house and installed a charger, we still own an ICE vehicle, and I plan to install solar to mitigate the vagaries of asinine energy policies and pricing...and claim back some more of my misspent tax $'s). YMMV
Why I like the car (relative to an ICE vehicle):
I'm not listing a number of areas where BEV manufacturers have raised the bar but that are also feasible and starting find their way into ICE (for example touch screen interfaces, sensors and self driving capabilities), or that are unique to my particular BEV.
- Handling has proven superior to ICE equivalent, mostly due to lower center of gravity & torque vectoring enabled by individual/multiple drive motors.
- (Much) Higher HP and torque. Translates to power when I need it and superior towing capacity/experience (if not tow range).
- More storage space (no engine/no gas tank) relative to ICE equivalent (battery space is recouped by the elimination of exhaust system and driveshaft)
- Regenerative braking (one pedal driving) means I hardly need to use brakes and allows me to modulate my speed much more efficiently (generally results in a much more relaxed driving experience).
- Ability to charge (fill up) at home and for (substantially) less $/mile
Cons:
- Range: This was my biggest concern prior to purchase. In reality the driving/charging experience is better for 99% of my daily driving and incidentally (and surprisingly to me) for most of my road trips (<350 miles one way - varying weather/temp conditions); in my experience it's added an incremental 15mins to these trips without changing my driving style. Have not yet tried, but likely inferior for longer trips. Generally, range is a concern on road trips.
- Charge times: Daily is not an issue (car charges while I sleep). For road trips as mentioned above, it adds ~15 mins for most of my normal trips (expect that spread to increase on longer trips requiring more charges). I'll be more comfortable as the infrastructure continues to build out.
- Battery is warrantied for 8yrs; roughly as long as I typically own my car (but replacing batteries would be concern).
On a policy note, it's unfortunate that both sides have gone into their camps. I personally like that BEVs introduce optionality and allows us to diversify our energy consumption mix. That the pols inevitably find a way to politicize it, is a shame.
I keep wondering what will happen when CA gets one of their many annual wild fires, and people whose cars aren't charged because charging takes hours, are stuck unable to get away because Newsom gave an edict they must all drive electric cars.
And yeah, these climate change trenders don't have a clue or don't care their push for electric cars are killing children and people in Congo and destroying their world wholesale.
California's Gavin Newsome has done exactly NOTHING to improve an antiquated electrical grid that has trouble providing day to day service. Yet he is travelling to "red" states to tell them why they are wrong and how they should emulate California!
One more month and I am OUT OF HERE!
Just don’t do what every other Californian does - move to Colorado and immediately set about changing it to be more like California.
God bless, travel safely and wish luck in your new home!
It’s already happening. They have rolling blackouts that prevent charging their mandates electric cars. But the Sheeple bleat on...
Even worse. These EVs catch on fire and are almost impossible to put out. The EVs might CAUSE the major forest fire.
The environmental cost to dispose of them will be even worse.
There is no plan for recycling batteries, and there is no plan for recycling solar panels that have a 15 year life span.
Good questions, "What's the plan?"
15 years?? more like 5 to 7
That’s true the batteries aren’t biodegradable and stay with us forever.
Your last comment is very sad. I was a veteran of the War on Drugs (on the Drug side.), survived the Sexual Revolution and experienced an era of unprecedented creativity in music. The economy roared along for the most part and then came computers and the Internet.
And yes, NOTHING was better than making a beer run to Evanston on the weekend (Salt Lake City only had 3.2 beer), through the mountains full of HP who just KNEW there were kids picking up kegs, waiting on the 100 mile run. Cranking the rock, making out in the back seat, daring...just daring...and these kids have "correct attitudes and mindful speech" to compensate for not doing any of that stuff? God, no wonder they have depression and anxiety and respond with hateful savagery if anyone asks them to prove any of their beliefs.
Like I said, sad. I almost feel guilty for how much better my youth was, even despite the near absence of free porn.
I was thinking the same thing while reading this article.
I agree. With the current mining & processing conditions, it is much more environmentally degrading & polluting to drive an EV.
I will not buy an EV until all mining & processing is done in an environmentally responsible way & by a well-paid labor force.
My sister has a Tesla. It is silent when moving, and she lives in the countryside, so she is hitting lots of birds.
thats just horrible!!
Slow demise? Feels pretty darn fast to me!
The demise is our doing. Pessimism is the victory they seek over us. You give them what they want by making comments like this
I grew up in a rural area. We had old cars that often did not run. It sucks to be stuck. I would choose a hybrid maybe but not likely. I prefer cold climates. I want a car to start.
The other thing that bothers me about EV batteries is the environmental degradation that will happen to create the batteries, the mining necessary to get the materials necessary. Does that matter to environmental activists?
sad but true
Wow brilliant post.
This breaks my heart. As a teenager in the late 90's my list of "can't wait" to dos was endless. I was at the DMV on my 15th birthday applying for my learner's permit, and again in my 16th birthday taking my driving test. I wasted no time to enjoy every right of passage we traditionally associate with teenage life. Fast forward to today: my 15-year-old son is perfectly content to spend a weekend in solitude. I had to beg him for weeks to study for his learner's permit, and since getting said permit 6+weeks ago, I've convinced him to go out for one driving lesson, which he begrudgingly agreed to provided it lasted no more than 10 minutes. I keep telling myself it's a "phase" but more and more I think it's a generational disease.
The solitude thing is really weird, isn’t it? My 16-year-old son spends far less time in person with his peers than I did. (They’re all on Discord.) He does hang out with them after school for band, stage crew, chess club, etc., but I think they’ve done one spontaneous activity not related to school in two years.
My son did just get his license, so here’s hoping!
At least he got his license & does activities in person, that's good
Does he have a job yet? Kids need jobs. Mine are elementary school but required to do chores at home. And no way will I ever give them any money, for anything. I want them to start working as soon as they can. I started baby-sitting age 9
He got a work permit at 15 for a seasonal job last fall. It was a great experience, but he’s going to concentrate on getting his Eagle Scout rank this summer. (That’s a job in itself.)
I started baby sitting at 11, cleaning apartments at a retirement home at 13.
And yes, I think the two main problems are overscheduled kids, especially sports, which gets Soviet-style intense around middle school, and electronics.
seasonal job & Eagle Scouts is great!
I agree: over scheduling kids, activities & electronic
mine are elementary school but we don't schedule them for anything or do any activities. Friends of ours do, but I'm personally not into driving around activities. Not something I want to do. We just send them out to play in the yard or play in the basement if bad weather. Or go see if neighbors are outside. I plan to avoid smartphones & will give them simple (no-data/wifi) phones in jr high. I limit screen time to 1 hr/day max.
The lack of spontaneous activities. So relate to that.
Is there anything we can do to improve this? Last year, I partnered with the mom of one of his friends, and we would kick one out of the house to go fishing, or play yu-gi-oh at the other's house. They had a great time, but neither would pursue it on his own. I think my son is worried he'll look "weird" if he's the one to suggest he and his friends actually do something. He's not a timid guy at all, but when it comes to social relations, I think teenagers don't have the context we used to, where we'd just go to someone's house and hang out till dinner.
yea that's so strange. I used to just ride my bike around with friends, all day, doing who knows what, random spontaneous things & my parents had no idea where I was...lol...and I'm in my 30s now
maybe because kids these days have so many planned activities? Mine are elementary school but we usually just tell them "go play in the yard by yourselves" or "go play in the basement" if weather is bad. We'll go for a walk & see if anyone is out, spontaneous. I don't pay for any scheduled activities for them. I'm not interested in being a soccer mom/hockey mom.
That makes me so sad ...... I am fearful for my grandchildren.
Me too. I may have to move to the Bay Area , they live there, just to teach them to be adventurers.
Mine was the same but once he finally got his license he was out of here. They all go to the mountains and 24 hour diners and stay out late doing stupid stuff. Of course I get mad and set boundaries but secretly I’m glad they’re making mistakes and learning lessons that don’t involve remote controls and virtual reality.
You give me hope!
soon you too will get new gray hairs every time you hear about the newest dumb thing they did haha
My son rode his boogie board on a flooded stream on a golf course under bridges and such at night. He also went with friends to parking structures at 2 am to skateboard in them. I never found out until much later. I'm glad.
My eldest son is 36 and doesn’t drive. My middle son is 31 and has just passed his driving test. My youngest son doesn’t drive and he’s 29. None of them live at home, and the two younger ones have children of their own. They don’t spend all their time at home either. They live a couple of hours from me, by train. I just recently visited my 31 year old and my granddaughter. We’re planning another visit soon. None of us feel particularly disadvantaged not having a car. I’m happy about it actually, I’m no longer a sitting target for everyone that wants to make a quick buck - gas stations, insurance companies, local authorities, parking garage companies, but I recognise I’m in the minority. My wife and I get just about everywhere we want, albeit sometimes a little slower. I never have to worry about DUI either, although my wild party all-night drinking days are long past, I can enjoy a few drinks with dinner when we go out and not worry.
All I can say is you must live in NYC or San Fran where people use public transportation. Trying living in TX or SD without a car.
I think it’s sad that so many people don’t have access to good public transportation. I actually live in suburban London, England. I have bus service 24/7. I am a 15-20 minute ride from work; my wife about 40 minutes. There is very limited parking where I work and my wife would have to pay a daily rate to park near her workplace. We are just lucky, and I realise that not everyone has the option of not having a car.
The UK is around 60% the size of CA. Plus Europe has long had more efficient mass transit. For a time I drove 60 miles one way to work, no-one in the UK is doing that.
There are some that do that, but most would use rail transport. The US once had a comprehensive rail network but passenger numbers fell away a lot earlier there, than in Europe. Railroad mileage in the US reached its peak in 1916, whereas in the UK it was some twenty years later. In a few areas of the UK, some of the lost lines have been re-instated. Many conurbations in the UK have serious traffic problems, due to high density of cars, similar to some areas of the US.
Gasoline has been less expensive in the US than in the UK or most of Europe, but in my own experience, when I lived in the US, my gas bill was at least as high as in the UK, as I had to drive everywhere. Here, i can walk to local 7-11, my nearest bar, the doctors, dentist, and local park. Land use here is much denser.
It takes 3+ days to drive across the USA and only 1 to drive the width of the British Isles. Big, BIG difference!
rural life requires a car. rural life is being extinguished .. the UK has beautiful country side but you cannot see it without a car
nope. no one is doing that. in fact in the UK they are now implementing "15 min cites" where everyone can stay within the "circle". the population is so much easier to control when yhou know where they are at all times. the UK ?? cctv EVERYWHERE and I mean everywhere. the UK citizens are complacent and compliant..and very aware of class
I don’t think the poster is criticizing you or saying you shouldn’t drive, just sharing his perspective.
I didn’t take offense. I appreciate his perspective.
I just moved from Seattle and although they are increasing ways to get around publicly they also are dealing with significant increases in crimes on public transportation.
I'd never in a million years subject myself to the danger. The local news even had a segment where they FILMED a homeless guy smoking fentanyl on one bus and it's become a thing lately. The other commuters just sat there quietly while the guy poisoned the air around them.
Add to this all the crime in other big cities on public transportation and you just have to wonder why anyone would choose that over owning their own car (or even ride sharing)
Is the risk of public transit greater than the risk of driving? The risk of dying in a car crash is 13 per 100,000 people per year. The NYC subway has 84 million trips per month. Assuming the same people ride every day twice a day equals 6 million unique riders. There were 88 deaths on the subway last year so your odds are 8.8 per 100,000. Couldn't find injury stats per person for both so couldn't do a comparison there.
Maybe that's true but while I'm taking higher chances in my own car I don't have to keep a weary eye on everyone around me and don't have to put up with the smells of unwashed people or their rantings at the ceiling.
To each their own Scott
fascinating info, Scott d...keep riding that mass transit, nobody is going to stop you...
How did you travel during the pandemic? Elbow-to-elbow with 30 sniffling, coughing people?
Try living almost anywhere in CA without a car.
Our son lives in Berlin. The public transportation is good, but I wonder about elderly people. If you're healthy and strong, public transportation is great, but when walking becomes challenging or you have to drag your groceries home in a little hand cart two or three times a week, what happens then? Do all elderly people get warehoused in large facilities or do the death panels kick in?
I’m with you. Personally I don’t like to drive. I used to hate it in fact! And I’ve structured my life so I don’t have to do it much.
I don’t mind it so much now that I don’t have a commute. Commutes suck! Can we all agree on that?
Now when I drive it’s on a road trip to somewhere nice or down the road to the grocery.
Anyway just sharing my perspective, not trying to tell people not to drive.
that's great, eyebee..you continue to do you and let the rest of us make our own choices..
someone has to get you to the train station..what do you do with your grandchildren when you visit. stay at home.. no zoos.. no playgrounds. .. no trips to interesting places. and those "quick bucks". it is called employment
I hear that, but if I didn’t have a car, it’s bike or walk where I live. I do enjoy both, but not for groceries.
It’s a really strange thing. I turned 16 in 2004 and had my license on my 16th birthday. I grew up on a farm, though, and driving meant freedom and the only line to my friends. I was also the last of the kids in CO that only had to have a permit for 6 months and didn’t have to take drivers ed. I do think that the cost and time commitment of drivers ed is prohibitive - or at least used as an excuse - for some families.
That said, all of my younger siblings got drivers licenses when they were 16, if not quite on their birthday. When I was teaching high school in the 2010s, I thought it was really strange how many kids didn’t seem to worry about getting a license. That was in a fairly rural area, too. Seems it’s only gotten more common.
I love to drive. I don’t understand the point of a self-driving car - why buy a car and never drive it yourself? - and I feel sorry for kids that don’t see the value in driving.
I hope you are not giving him any money, "Allowance" or paying him for doing chores?
Kids need jobs. They need to work. So so so important. Mine are elementary school but required to do chores at home. And no way will I ever give them any money, for anything. I want them to start working as soon as they can. I started baby-sitting age 9
Two teenaged boys; getting them out of the house, much less behind the wheel of a car, was/is like pushing a rope.
They gotta get jobs. Put those kids to work! :) as my husband says
It was in the last century when a boy with a car was deemed to be "dangerous" by parents of teen girls.
It takes failure and then overcoming that failure to develop self-esteem. Kids fear failure and parents no longer encourage it… that those same children then lack self-esteem is no surprise, the surprise is that we continue to promote the same “safety” at the expense of human development
This is an ongoing battle with my young children! If something doesn’t work the first time, they are over it.
I'm venture that all parents face a similar problem. The difference is for almost all of human history, adults had no choice but to force their kids to keep going because food had to be put on the table. Now, life is also way too easy for most adults, and we aren't dealing with it any better than the kids are. Exercise, fresh air, and some manufactured hardships have helped me... though no idea what difference that makes to others. That, and forcing myself to try to learn something tangible. Whether it's household projects, getting chickens (are current foray), learning to hunt, whatever. I try to keep challenging myself to learn tangible skills so my children can see the benefit of struggling, redoing, struggling again, and slowly figuring it out. I'm not sure I have any better advice than giving kids something to strive for, allowing them to fail, and rewarding performance (as long as that performance was EARNED).
And, my eternal plea for service. One of the best things you can do for children, especially in an era where social media is just fake perfect lives and kids (and many adults) come to believe that's reality (especially because of how class-divided most communities are these days), is allow them to not only see what difficulty looks like, but to step up and make a real difference and learn about both themselves and the world around them from understanding those differences. We ALL could use more service in our life, but perhaps children who are driven to school, and driven to soccer practice where they practice on perfectly manicured fields in new cleats every year watching their ipad between games while they sip on designer beverages (I'm mocking myself now, not you if you're reading this) could use it the most...
I agree service & volunteering in the community are very beneficial for kids
Senator Ben Sasse of Nebraska sends his 3 kids to farms and ranches in Nebraska to learn life lessons. I hope to do this with my kids when they are a bit older!
"The Vanishing American Adult: Our Coming-of-Age Crisis and How to Rebuild a Culture of Self-Reliance"
https://www.npr.org/2017/05/16/528475092/no-more-neverland-a-senators-guide-to-raising-american-adults
Senator Sasse: "We want them to get dirt under their fingernails," he said, "and we want them to have to get up at 4:30 a.m. when they don't want to."
He says these experiences help build "scar tissue for the soul."
"I think we are doing a bad job of helping our kids understand that they have resiliency," he said. "Persevering and getting through hardship makes you tough."
"I think this category of perpetual adolescence, it's a new thing, and it's a dangerous thing. Adolescence is intentionally transitioning from childhood to adulthood. Being stuck in adolescence — that's a hell. Peter Pan is a dystopia, and we forget that. Neverland is a bad place to be. It is good for kids to learn how to work. Right now, we're acting like keeping our kids free from work is a way to treat them really nicely, when in reality thoughtful parenting wants to help free our kids to find meaning in work."
I was definitely chauffeured to many horse shows and soccer practices when I was younger, but then as a consequence of divorce, basically left to fend for myself after 15. No drivers license until my boyfriend drove me to the DMV at 18, I’d travel 6+ hours by train and bus, NYC to NH, to get between my parents. (Nothing I would ever trust my kids to do, and looking back, I’m horrified that I did it.) Having seen all ends of it, both as a kid, and now as a teacher and mom, there are so many variables and ‘ways to skin the cat.’
My kids are still young- 6 and 8, and many things come naturally to them. But my daughter is in choir this spring, didn’t get a solo, likes it enough to keep going, but is also exhausted with it. So that has been a good experience.
In one of my last posts, I discussed how the ‘parenting-industrial complex’ is harming kids, and so much of it is wrapped up in that projection of perfect lifestyle. I’m implementing parent outreach in my community to try and shift the culture.
My kids are 6 & 4 & expecting a third
I agree w/ you about ‘parenting-industrial complex’ harming kids & projection of perfect lifestyle. Social media destroys kids/teens & causes anxiety/depression/suicide. One thing that I like about myself: I could care less what people think of me & peer pressure has Zero effect on me. I don't use social media or show off my lifestyle. If anything, I try to hide my wealth. My husband & I both grew up without much money, now we are doing well via hard work. But I want my kids to experience as much hardship as possible. For their future well-being. We don't do any scheduled activities. My mom friends try to convince me but I'm not doing it. LOL. We send them to the yard to play on their own or the basement to play on their own. We go to the neighborhood playground.
I'm also doing this (no smartphones/smart devices til 8th grade, they will have no-data simple phones):
https://www.waituntil8th.org/
Congrats on the third! I also have a one year old but she is quite persistent. 😅 I have heard of wait until 8th and completely agree. But I am also hopeful that we are at *peak woke* etc and there will be a cultural correction.
Let them fail and keep trying. If they cry/throw a tantrum, tell them to try again
I have little kids too
We gotta let them fail & learn from mistakes
Also independent, unstructured play. Always. Nothing scheduled. No activities. We tell them "go in the backyard & play on your own" if its nice out. If weather is bad "go play in the basement"
I really fought with myself about the organized sports thing bc I always figured my kids would play sports- I liked it and learned a lot of great lessons from them. But the schedules are brutal- we did one season of T-Ball and never again.
Ironically, many of my kids tantrums happen during their copious amounts of unstructured outdoor play time!! They have ‘rage to perfection’ big time.
lol yea we get a lot of tantrums too
yea the schedules are too much. esp "travel sports" is something I don't want to do. I talk to parents who do "travel sports", they basically spend M-F working, then their weekends (which are supposed to be your well-deserved time off!) are spent waking up at 4:30am to drive 3 hours to another state, spend the entire day there, and then drive back 3 hours. this is every weekend. These people are Exhausted. And its super expensive!
When I was a kid, I did school sports (jr high, high school) so my parents didnt drive me, the bus drove me, and I did park district which I rode my bike there. I would totally let my kids do school sports if school is driving them. No problem. When they are older, I'm fine letting them do park district, though I would limit it to 1 sport at a time. but no travel sports. I'm not going to spend every weekend suffering all day.
The expense in both time and money is absurd. We mess around on the tennis courts, but I’ve also realized how young they still are to really be pushed too hard. Which has been hard to wrap my mind around compared to how I was raised.
FREEDOM.The feeling of freedom is what driving has always meant to me and millions of others. The freedom to get in your car and just... DRIVE. I am sure I am not alone in remembering times of sadness where I just took off for an hour or two. Alone in my car. To regroup. To think. And to listin to a device that is now attack: AM stations playing great music. Today freedom is not in vogue . The truth is that real freedom scares many of those under 25. Perhaps because they have never really felt it. Very sad. I cannot wait for my next road trip. As an older guy the main difference is that I need "health stops" much more frequently than in days gone by! Kids, get out there and "See the USA in your Chevrolet."
One more thing. Even today as I start a long road trip I text close family my favorite road song to listen to as I sing it very LOUD : Willie Nelson's "On the road again."
In Waterbury, Vt for the weekend and was joyously passed by a flock of bikers on their Harleys (and a few Kawasakis), and from what I could tell, no one riding was under sixty..
Once in a while I see a young daredevil on a motorcycle weaving through Interstate traffic, and I would think of myself on mine decades ago (and emerged happily unscathed..) - but by far the riders I see today are all looking for that elixir they know still exist within themselves.
Freedom, indeed.
Yep. I remember an exit to a highway in St. Louis that pointed the way to California....how many times I imagined just getting on the highway and just keep driving...on those depressed days. The fact that it was an option always made me feel liberated and BETTER.
Amen!
Could it be that the previous generations of overly protective, safety focused, helicoptering parents have created this risk-averse, cocooned new generation? My generation (Baby Boomer) were parent-averse, avoiding parental oversight as much as possible, and parents were too busy to care for the most part. We learned to fend for ourselves, get into and out of trouble, and fight our own fights. I remember my Dad finding me in a fight with another kid and telling me to hurry up and finish it because dinner was waiting. My friends and I played contact sports only occasionally with adult supervision and with only the barest of protective equipment (football helmets were, at best, plastic concussion devices), and we proudly displayed our scars to our girlfriends (but not our mothers). Male toughness was an expected if not honored trait among my peers. It may not have been the best of times nor the best of male development, but it produced men willing to take risks. It seems to me that women are now the risk takers, showing the mental and physical toughness once the domain of men.
I have a slightly different take. We are paying the price of the feminization of America. All the risk avoidance; the mania for safety; the constant harping; is distinctly feminized. And we are much the worse for it. The knitting circle did not venture forth across oceans and untamed continents.
There is something to that view. When I entered the Air Force Academy in 1963, there was a poem prominently displayed over the entrance. It was titled "The Coming American", authored by Sam Walter Foss, and it began, "Bring me men to match my mountains; / Bring me men to match my plains; / Men with empires in their purpose / And new eras in their brains . . ." It was a paeon to masculinity, and an inspiration to young men. It is no longer there at the Academy; removed when women were admitted to the classes of cadets. Now, I fully understand and accept that women have the capability and the right to pursue their dreams in the Air Force or any field of endeavor, but I do not believe that female progress has to denigrate or dismiss male characteristics, nor do I think that women need to imitate those characteristics to succeed. The current concentration on female opportunities and advancement in all fields need not come at the suppression or imitation of men.
Well-said, James.
Let’s recognize the differences between the sexes (vive la difference!) and celebrate it too. Masculinity needs to be understood and encouraged.
It’s also interesting to have the AF presume that the women attending didn’t feel the same sense of power. The poem could have been tweaked just a bit and it would have worked. Instead it was cast out. That’s the problem right there
Yes, the poem's use of "men" could easily be construed as "mankind", as women have obviously been historically instrumental in the pioneering spirit of the nation, accompanying their men into the wilderness, building and defending their homesteads and settlements.
We don’t have to be mountains like men. But women absolutely can move mountains. Why the need to strike down one sex for the other is beyond ridiculous.
Because it was 1963 not 2023. You are talking a 40 year difference. Now all you hear is first women to do this, first black woman, first Hispanic, first Asian, first Muslim, big fucking deal. Same with the nationally of men being the firsts. If a woman or man is qualified pick them. If you're picking for the first to occupy some position, you get what we have today. Box checkers who were hired just to check that box.
As a mother with a successful career, I agree with you
Women don't need to act like men to do well in their job
the current de-masculization going on in Hollywood & Leftist culture is harmful to everyone. we should encourage boys and men to embody strong masculine character traits
They should have added a sign and motto for women rather than removing the one for young men.
I would agree that women--moms mostly I think--push for safety. But it's just not true that risk avoidance is a feminine trait. For one thing, women generally don't knit anymore since industrialization relieved them from having to make clothes by hand. And IME girls and women overwhelmingly seek to travel around the world more. Back when I was a teen going on group trips through programs for kids to live and travel abroad, almost all the participants were girls. As adults, my single girlfriends with means would travel everywhere on their own, including far-flung unusual places as long as women are free to travel solo. For those who are partnered, the guys and husbands also travel because their wives or girlfriends planned the trips. Otherwise they'd never bother to get off their asses and go anywhere.
The constant harping for safety today is not a result of moms harping. It's a symptom of a first world where people live too comfortably and are out of touch with living, and have so few real problems they begin manufacturing problems,
And why is it you talk about "feminization" in such a way to clearly express traits associated with females are negative? I wouldn't disagree that a world tipped overly toward female traits dominant may lead to new problems, but a world tipped overly toward male traits dominant had proven historically to be disastrous for at least the female half of the population, and not so great for many men who died in wars or at hands of the likes of, Hitler, Stalin and Mao. Currently we've got totally masculinized worlds in Iran, Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, and loads of Middle East countries. How much greater are they for it?
Well, you argue that a male dominated world was the cause of all evil. So the answer to that is women in combat? I'm still laughing over that one. And, the mostly Islamic societies that "oppress" women. Who screeches about "Islamophobia" and "tolerance?" You can't have it both ways, much as you might want that.
I do not view feminism as negative. I view the imposition of it on men as negative. There are differences between the sexes that are to be celebrated. There is, however, a crisis among young men today that nobody can dispute. Yet the only thing we see and hear is about female empowerment and how women are oppressed. So, no, boys are not just damaged girls. And masculine traits are not to be bred out of society. Because we do so at our peril.
Feminisms biggest detractor is that is focuses on discounting and wholly devaluing men. They are not binary choices. Instead feminism should be promoting strong women alongside strong men. That’s where it has failed big time.
Ok Bruce, you're jumping to conclusion and putting words in my mouth. Where did I say that "a male dominated world was the cause of all evil"?? I did not say that and I do not think that. I just think that when you say the "feminization of the world" and "we're much worse for it" is inaccurate. Because much worse for whom? And the way you said it implied a negative undertone for a world where women might be dominant.
As for women in combat, I would say if the world is entirely run by women, there would be fewer violent wars, because women deal with conflicts differently. Not necessarily better, but different, So there would be a lot fewer combats. Often when I make this point, some men would trounced out the few historical female national leaders who waged war. But that's counterpoint is a fallacy because these few exceptions were still operating in a male dominant world. They had to play by male dominant rules.
But you won't get dispute from me that men are superior in physical strength and therefore more physically suited to ground combat being the actual fighters. But with other equalizers, such as pushing a button to send a drone, I think a woman can do just fine. BTW, a lot of women served on the ground in ground combat for all practical purposes since WWII, often having to face the same risks. Nonetheless, I'm not going to go into the rabbit hole here on this point. I'm actually on the opposite side of liberals who haven't the slightest clue what combat is like pushing for women in combat.
I don't know why you put scare quotes around "oppress" when talking about Islamic societies oppressing women. You know it's true. You can make sound and valid arguments without using scare quotes which belittle what women in the Middle East are going through. It's ok to have some sympathy. Sympathy can be a masculine trait too.
As for screeching about "Islamophobia" and "tolerance", I don't see it as women doing it. It's the left that's doing it. In fact, screeching about "Islamophobia" and "tolerance" has been one of the most successful ways of shutting down and silencing women speaking up about Islamic societies' denial of basic human rights to women, and also what happened with the human trafficking gang in England. So in my POV, it's left wing pushing it, not women.
As for "feminism", I want to point out that I'm not talking about "feminism". From your earlier post, you were talking about "feminized", which I read as general female traits, or female dominant. That's not the same as "feminism", and I think the distinction is very important. So if we're not talking about feminism but "feminine traits", well I think men and women have a lot more traits in common than not, and there are some traits which are more exhibited in men or women. But even that is not absolute, as the population are all gender nonconforming to some degree. It's just a matter of how much. Following this line of thinking, to me a world more "feminized" doesn't mean individual men have to be more like women. It just means a society that takes more women's approaches to operating and dealing with problems. AND I don't think that's better or worse. I think it is just better in some cases while leads to other issues and problems. I don't think either feminized or masculinized is better or worse. Each will raise its own problems. In real life IME at least, at work, the environments are always best when there's a balance of men and women working.
If you're moving the goalpost to talk about "feminism", then it's a different discussion altogether. Once upon a time, feminism brought women equal rights and made things better for women to live in society in equal terms. "Feminism" today is a shit show and I'd say it's damaging not just boys but girls as well. As for calls for "female empowerment" and "women are oppressed", well if it makes you feel better, those are empty calls. Women's rights are being rolled back to the 1950s now in subjugation to "Trans". The left is dismantling women's rights as we speak.
As for masculine traits being bred of out society, I do agree that politically from the left, what are traditionally perceived as masculine traits are not being valued. A lot of those traits IMO are not really masculine traits, but only perceived to be so because women had been excluded from taking part of the world outside of home. I think these traits are universally human, and many of them we should celebrate and encourage. But they're being devalued because they're associated with being "masculine". And yes I agree with you we're doing so at our peril.
There is a crisis among young men and boys. But let me ask you: why aren't older men stepping up and doing something about it instead of just sitting and blaming women? Why aren't more men taking rein then to show boys positive masculine traits? How to be a good man, a good son, a good husband, and a good father. How to self improve instead if indulging in internet porn and gaming! Men can do that irrespective of women or "feminists" or the left. You can let crazies be crazies and take control and teach boys how to value themselves. Why aren't more men doing that? Instead we have crybaby-in-chief Donald Trump, star athletes who make headlines for misbehaving, and Andrew Tate. Why aren't there more men talking to boys on self improvement besides Jordan Peterson?
And why are young men and boys so fragile that just a because women are doing better in some instances, it's enough to make them curl up in fetal position being damaged? I'm asking this seriously. Girls and young women had lived in a world where men had the upper hand for thousands of years. Women, not just feminine traits, were entirely excluded from society in many parts of the world. Somehow, women and girls just gritted their teeth and bore it and got on until very recent times. Why didn't their trauma debilitate them to the point of giving up like the boys and young men today?
"Why aren't more men taking rein to show boys positive masculine traits? How to be a good man, a good son, a good husband, and a good father. How to self improve instead of indulging in internet porn and gaming! Why aren't there more men talking to boys on self improvement besides Jordan Peterson?"
As a female physician & mom, I agree. Dads/uncles should show young men how to be a man & embody positive traits. Porn & gaming is beyond destructive. Just like social media for girls. I see the harm it does to my young patients. Porn, video games, social media, smartphones, devices for kids/teens----> lead to anxiety, depression, suicide, self harm. they put these kids on very harmful Psych drugs but instead they should just take away the stupid devices. At least 1/2 the kids diagnosed with ADHD would not have it if you took away video games/devices & made sure they got enough sleep at night. I tell parents all day. I hope they listen.
With my own kids, I limit the screen time < 60 minutes per day (and that's a max), they don't have devices & they will not have any devices until they are 14. when they are in Jr High, I will let them have simple phones with No Data that can call/text only.
Just read your response. Thank you for that. I agree fully with your points. Especially on the limitation of tech. There is a beautiful big world out there that both tests and rewards us. Tech is just an illusion. The Matrix writ large and uncomfortably true. Men need to be fathers. Teachers and guides. And take their daughters and sons into that big, beautiful world.
Wow that was quite a response.
We probably agree on more than that on which we disagree. Although given the propensity for women to support the leftist Democrats in the US, they don't get a pass for that.
Yes, men to need to stand up, be better role models and take role in raising their children. To do that we need a society - and a government - that values and rewards that. Ours does not. We need to stop equating the sexes. To value each for their distinct virtues. In other words, return to normalcy and sanity.
A lot of women would consider voting Republicans if they stop passing insane anti-abortion laws. As long as they do this, they make it impossible for women to vote Republican, and a lot of women would vote Dem not because they support leftist agenda, but to them this is ground zero of women's right and freedom. Whatever you may think of abortion, this is the fact.
If you ask me, I think DeSantis really shot himself in the foot. If he had real galls, he could've brought the laws to reflect the national consensus, and tout FL as the model with the previous 16 weeks legal period. But he caved and showed he's a wimp after all, and he knows it too when signed this latest bill at night with no press and no fanfare. If Republicans would stop being so far right on this issue, a lot of women would finally be free to have choice not just about their own bodies but choice of which party to vote for.
"a world tipped overly toward male traits dominant had proven historically to be disastrous"
And yet two of the biggest, and most influential warmongers, Hillary Clinton and Victoria Nuland, are women.
Two women? Seriously? Two women were warmongers so it's enough to deduct how a female dominant world would be just as violent?
Ted Bundy and Jeffrey Dahmer were two of the biggest and most notorious serial killers ever. Are they enough to deduct men are serial killers?
Hillary isn't even a good example. She was a product of the 60s and 70s when women had to prove they could play like boys. She probably carried that mindset with her for the rest of her life.
But to seriously answer your question, the few exceptional women world leaders pursuing war is a reflection of them playing in a male dominant international arena where the rules are set by men. If the overwhelming majority of world leaders are women, there would not be nearly as many wars. I'm not saying the world would be necessarily better. Just less violent.
I’m confused. You argue then men and women are really just alike, only women have been unable to express certain traits because they couldn’t work outside the home.
Then you argue that women are less violent than men and if they were in charge there would be fewer wars, or none at all.
Just pointing out the discrepancy in your argument because I see a lot of people making the same argument and it always baffles me. What reasoning led you to this conclusion?
If you haven’t read The Power you should. It’s about this same subject.
No, I'm no arguing in the absolutes. I think there are many traits that are traditionally associated with masculinity but are general human traits, such as courage and bravery, logical, risk taking, assertiveness, etc. (Risk taking is a nuanced one because we can delve deeper depending on whether we're talking about physical risks or situational risks.) I think these are traits that are not uniquely masculine but are associated with masculinity because women traditionally didn't have roles outside of homes that gave them opportunities or needs to express those traits.
But I also think there are some traits exhibited by more men vs. more women, and these traits by and large stem from biological differences. In regards to war and violence, when we look at violent crime data, the facts are most violent crimes are committed by men. (BTW I'm not saying men as a demographics are violent. I'm only pointing out that crime data shows a much higher percentage of violent criminals to be men rather than women.) There are also data showing males to be more responsive to visual stimulations. That may make them better hunters and combat fighters for example (and video games?)
Does that clarify what I meant? Thanks for the book recommendation. I'll check it out.
"women world leaders pursuing war is a reflection of them playing in a male dominant international arena where the rules are set by men"
Oh please. Given the chance, women can be just as imperialistic as men. I'm sure at some point in your life you've repeated the phrase, "behind every successful man, there is a woman". Well the corollary to that is "behind every warring man is a woman".
I don't think that of you, Bruce! I see your comments on TFP often and quite enjoy them. And from reading our thread I think your original comment was more a generalization pointing to a complaint many of us here have toward liberal "feminism" today. (Frankly I think feminism today is toxic.) I sometimes reply not so much to argue with the OP but to make a case to lurkers and spectators when I feel like there's some comments may be debatable.
Also it's no surprise you and I agree more than we disagree once we go into deeper conversations, or else we wouldn't have ended up here in the first place. There are healthy discussions going on here where people can come to flesh out different perspectives.
Understanding the Order/Chaos, masculine/feminine dichotomy has really helped me frame what is happening (thank you, Dr. Peterson!). Neither are bad, both are necessary for civilization to progress.
Personally, though, I’m more than ready for Order again.
Re: the knitting circle- young female knitters have been some of the most viscous on line starting in 2014... they mobbed non-conformists, ie those who don't march to LEFTISM on instagram creating a ‘purity spiral’ - anything Trump, right wing, patriotic, Christian was attacked. At the largest knitting on-line site Ravelry - knitters displaying any of those traits had their work taken down, they were ostracized, banished and mobbed. Young women today can be very viscous. And an embarassment compared to generations in the past.
They DO stick together, viscous, to the vicious exclusion of those with greater fluidity!
Re: the knitting circle- young female knitters were some of the most viscous on-line starting 2014... they mobbed non-conformists (to them, folks who wouldn’t salute leftists positions) on line creating a ‘purity spiral’ - anything Trump, right wing, patriotic, Christian was attacked in that community. At the largest knitting on-line site Ravelry - knitters displaying any of those traits had their work taken down, they were ostracized and banished and mobbed. Young women today can be very viscous.
Ravelry, the knitting coven, quickly became a psychotic witch’s brew. The utter worst of women (and I am one.
A guy goes to the Post Office to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him,
"Are you allergic to anything?" He replies, "Yes, caffeine."
"Have you ever been in the military service?" "Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for two years."
The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment."
Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"
The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both of my testicles.
The interviewer grimaces and then says, "OK. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now.
Our normal hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M. You can start tomorrow at 10:00 - and plan on starting at 10:00 A.M. every day."
The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M., why don't you want me here until 10:00 A.M.?"
"This is a government job," the interviewer says, "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls.
No point in you coming in for that."
🤣🤣🤣
So I must reply, Bruce..
You've used the word 'feminized' a few times. Quite all encompassing. I personally know women who would blow a man away in sheer aggressiveness.
I just posted above on motorcycles and freedom, this article being about the open road and all, and how I see so few younger riders (of which I used to be one..). But when I do? More often than not, there's long hair popping out from under the helmet, tattoos visible on open skin. Girls, glorious females and displaying every part of themselves, literally and figuratively, as they pop the throttle and pass me on the inside.
We do live in a world of risk avoidance, no question about that. I agree. But I don't think the word 'feminized' describes it.
I would offer the word 'control.'
Nah It's still feminized.
Plus it generated a lot of responses, positive and negative.
Mission accomplished. lol
Of that, I agree..
Maybe the young can't tear themselves away from video games and social media to want to drive.
Millennial Job Interview:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uo0KjdDJr1c
Kids can't get away from their parents today because they're all being GPS tracked by their parents wherever they go.
That's true. My buddy and his wife track their teenagers incessantly. The thing is, it would be easy to beat the tracking by LEAVING YOUR FUCKING PHONE AT HOME! But no modern teenager is willing to go anywhere without their phone, so they happily facilitate their own loss of freedom.
They're smarter than you give them credit for. My nieces are in high school and I'm the "cool" uncle so I know that they all just tell their parents they're going to their friends house, then leave their phones at said friends house, then go do whatever they want.
Potentially true. You could instead be the parent who doesn’t track their kids. Putting trust in them that they can do things on their own is critical. They also can know that if they need to call home if they’re in a bind they will be supported. Bring this back and remove the tracking
I'm not a parent, and anyway you're preaching to the choir. It's all the other parents I see. They ALL track their kids.
“It may not have been the best of times nor the best of male development, but it produced men willing to take risks.”
Since true masculinity is all but forbidden now (and the most celebrated people in western culture are men who decide to become “women”, it’s clearly no accident that men are being eliminated.
At least no one is redefining what it is to be a man. Now, Women are redefined as birthing people so that men who wish to be women are defined as real women.
Did I even just write that? What a world we live in.
Happy to report that my daughter is a throw-back exception. She got her license last month on the first day it was legally possible, worked three jobs to help buy her first car, and I have barely seen her since. She and her boyfriend of nearly a year are talking about taking a road trip this summer.
Her younger brother is twelve. I can feel the magnet of society trying to pull him and his peers inexorably away from work, independence, relationship and adventure, and toward passivity, in the form of a big bean bag, head set and game console.
Your daughter is awesome & way to go! wow
Your son will do just as great as his sister. Resist the peer pressure to buy him the bean bag, head set & game console. Just say no. Don't do it. Even if "all his friends" have it. Talk to the other moms too. Also something I'm doing:
https://www.waituntil8th.org/
This is the result of a combination of factors -- including the growth of social media, social services, helicopter parents, along with a society that puts little emphasis on responsibility.
When I received my driver's license at age 16 (way back in the 1970's) , one of the main benefits was that I was able to substantially increase my work hours. 90% of the money I earned at work was put aside to pay for college.
Many of today's high school students expect their parents to pay for college. Or - even better - they can simply take out loans with the expectation that the government will eventually waive their debt.
I'm in my 30s & I started working age 9. My parents told me they weren't going to pay for college & they contributed very little. I saved up money by working thru HS & paid for most of my undergrad. Med school---I took out minimum loans but it was still $300,000. Some of my (dumb) classmates took out max loans in med school & gambled in casinos with that money. I wish I were joking! We would watch them blow tons of money at casinos.
My husband & I paid off that $300,000 loan within 5 yrs. we are very disciplined. We don't spend any money. We have almost paid off the mortgage which is close to $900,000.
With my (almost 3) kids, my husband & I have already decided: they will work starting age 15/16. No allowances. They already do required chores & we dont give them money. they will go to either community college or no college. They can then transfer to a state public university. Unless they manage to get scholarships to go to a private one. We are not paying. We may pay very minimum. We are not co-signing on a bunch of loans. They are not going to go to any leftist brain-washing college. I'm just not going to co-sign loans.
I was on a similar path of today's teens, at 12 I was a chubby asthmatic boy who mostly stayed home. Then one of my friends, excited about Greg LeMond in the Tour de France, dragged me out and we rode our bikes 15 miles from home and turned around. The distances grew, and by 16, we were regularly doing 100-150 mile rides. We both had multiple near fatal crashes and mechanical issues 50+ miles from home, but the strength, both physical and mental, we gained from pushing ourselves so hard payed off. Teens havent changed. Some are always going to be meek, but parents need to let them go out with that one friend with crazy ideas. Today's helicopter parents and overly protective society would never let their teen or preteen jump on a bike and just disappear with no cell phone. They may even be charged with child endangerment. I was 15 and riding 20 miles each way to work from Newburgh to New Paltz every day to a bike shop because they sponsored me in races. That was seen as commitment then, most likely criminal now.
Your story brought to mind Theodore Roosevelt, who was also a young, frail asthmatic boy, who embraced a masculine, outdoor, rugged lifestyle. The rest, as they say, is history. Thanks for sharing it.
Just curious if y’all wore helmets on those early rides. I have a theory that the introduction of helmets in casual cycling led to a drop in cycling. My friends and I rode our bikes everywhere in the early 80s. I don’t see kids doing that anymore.
Helmets and gloves were always a must. Still have my helmet from one of my worst accidents where a car lost control, went into the wrong lane and hit me head on while we were both doing about 50. Completely shattered my helmet on his windshield. Helmets aren't the problem. Kids don't ride bikes to their friends houses anymore because they can just stay at home and play online games with them and chat using VOIP servers like discord. Even video games no longer have split screen multi-player like we used to have in the old classics like Goldeneye. Kids just don't play outside anymore.
Helmets are very important & I've seen way too much trauma & death as a physician. Helmets should be worn. Also don't ride your bike on a road next to a car. You will die. It's a matter of time. Ride the bike on the sidewalk. Just don't be dumb.
Motorcycles are called Donor-cycles for a reason: they are extremely dangerous & lead to frequent death
I should also mention anyone not wearing a seat belt is extremely stupid & deserves what will happen to them. Don't be dumb. Wear a helmet. Wear a seatbelt. Wear protective equipment.
I think some of it is the layout of communities, at least where I live, it is all tract homes and the kids ride around within the community but the main road is 60 MPH.
Yes. Have you seen the old movie “Breaking Away”? It speaks very much to the situation described in the article. I think author Rob Henderson would like it as well since it’s about working class kids, their obstacles and triumphs.
Yeah, I remember loving the movie as a teen, haven't seen it in years. May have to check to see if it's on any of the streaming services to remember old times...
I am a 68 years old widow. Just got back from a nearly 2000 mile car trip through our beautiful Southeastern region. At the Tennessee Welcome Center on the Tennessee river, south of Chattanooga, I had one of those near tears gasps of "how lucky I am to live in this country where we can drive from one place to another with being carded and see things like this." I get the same feeling when I drive to Maine or Ohio. It is a wonderful feeling to be traveling in a car listening to Elvis and loving our America.
🙌 I’d driven from New Jersey to Washington twice by the time I was 22. And so many trips in between. America is so beautiful, vast, and there is nothing better than a road trip. My family and I RV and are getting so excited for our summer trip. (Though it’s hard to get very far given how South we are in Texas. 🙄)
yes, I used to drive to Canada by myself when I was still in high school. a 500 mile trip to the family cabin. The Queen Elizabeth Way in Toronto was no joke.
Chattanooga is underrated, but only by those who haven't been.
Yep.
My youngest son doesn't drive.
That's the only one of the generalizations in this article that fits him. He works two jobs (and enjoys both), has plenty of friends, goes on trips, and generally seems to be living his life in an adventuresome but responsible fashion. 😀
I'm not sure who developed the equation "cars = FREEDOM," but it's an excellent example of supplier-induced demand.
Having cars is a very American thing. Most people in the world don't own cars because their geography and transportation systems don't require cars. But I get the point the author is making. It's less about driving than risk taking.
I think you're right.
But I don't think driving is a particularly good proxy variable for risk-taking.
Not a proxy, an example. 50 years ago it wasn't considered an outsized risk as much as a rite of passage. Now it is considered a risky undertaking, especially when viewed against a backdrop of safety-ism. And kids think self-driving cars and Uber make the whole thing unnecessary to get them wherever they want to go. That misses the point of being free to go wherever, whenever.
I guess the kids I know are very different from the kids a lot of the people on the Free Press message boards know. They take risks from time to time–intelligent risks. And some of them aren't interested in driving. 😀
How does your son get to work and school?
He bikes or takes public transportation.
And if the 2 jobs were 20 miles away, there was no public transportation, and it was 20 below zero???? To the majority of the country, cars DO equal freedom. I think people in major cities live in a bubble and don't recognize the reality of most of the country.
Commuting by car did not become a big thing in the U.S. until the mid-20th century. In fact, many mid-sized cities dismantled perfectly functional public transportation systems because gas was so cheap, and the idea that gas was not an endlessly renewable resource or might become the focal bargaining chip for endless geopolitical conflicts seemed completely alien.
Cars _may_ equal short-term freedom for numerous Americans trapped in an endless cycle of paycheck-to-paycheck commuting. But personally, I don't see being held hostage to soaring gasoline prices and OPEC toadying as any kind of long-term freedom.
Obviously, mileage varies on that one. 😀. (Pun intentional.)
https://www.census.gov/newsroom/press-releases/2021/public-transportation-commuters.html
Is toadying to China is better than toadying to OPEC? After reading Red Cobalt, I will never buy an EV.
Read the Census article -- I asked what city you live in (wondering if it's on the East Coast).
With the amount of environmental degradation and pollution and slave labor that goes into making an EV currently, I will never buy an EV.
They are slowly working on getting more mining/processing done in Canada & Australia, though that will take time. If they are able to do it, and make an EV without all the horrible pollution & slave labor, then at that point, I'll consider it
Hey, _I_ have a car! I live in the country; I couldn't function without a car. Upstate New York, since you're interested. 😀
My youngest son also lives in upstate New York but in a small, university-dominated city. Public transportation system is not great; I think he mostly uses it during the winter since it snows quite a bit there. Most of the time, he bikes.
"many mid-sized cities dismantled perfectly functional public transportation systems because gas was so cheap"
True & also General Motors streetcar conspiracy is fascinating:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/General_Motors_streetcar_conspiracy
"OPEC toadying"
We should not be beholden to OPEC & we should increase domestic energy production. Wall St, as usual, is causing problems b/c they only care about profits for themselves rather than lowering gas prices for everyone:
https://www.cnn.com/2022/03/02/energy/us-oil-production/index.html
“Oil and gas companies do not want to drill more,” said Pavel Molchanov, an analyst. “They are under pressure from Wall St to pay more dividends, to do more share buybacks instead of the proverbial ‘drill baby drill,’ which is the way they would have done things 10 years ago. Corporate strategy has fundamentally changed.”
If public transportation is available, its a much better option than driving. so totally makes sense for your son's situation
When I went to high-school in the late 60s’ “cars=FREEDOM” was simply our reality. Shortly after my friend got his driver’s license, in 1969 we borrowed his parents’ Volkwagen bus and drove from the South Bay up to the Oakland coliseum to hear the Rolling Stones. I guess kids can now listen to that concert on their iphone.
My non-driving son goes to plenty of concerts. 😀
Yeah, I guess kids now just have a lot more options. When I was a kid you had to drive around in a car to have a life; (a car with an 8 track cassette player). It was a very different world. I remember when they announced that the last BART station was going to be in Fremont, CA. But that was built long after I graduated.
Does your son take uber to his concerts?
Often, he goes to what I would call Destination Concerts. 😀
Like he'll train down to the Big City (which hereabouts is NYC) and then fly to wherever the bands are that he's interested in hearing for a festival event.
My wife and I recently flew to London for the Michael Buble concert! Which is so surreal for me, since when I was a little boy I remember that my Danish Grandma still made her own soap from saved fat drippings. It’s a very different world now.
I will say that arguing that your son doesn’t need a car because he take an airplane to concerts, complicates your “supplier-induced demand” argument a little bit 😊.
Ha, ha, ha. Yes, you're right about that one. 😀
But I don't think I was arguing that he doesn't "need" a car. Merely that he doesn't drive but doesn't seem to fit any of the other stereotypes in this article.
And I can assure you I was NOT an over-protective "bubble" parent! 😀 I drive; my other two sons drive; but my youngest does not—and doesn't seem to be suffering in terms of initiative, resilience, or quality of life.
Cars...FFS, encourage getting places by BICYCLE. Bikes are a machine for liberation. Yeah, sure, lots of people think 'many deaths by bike' but the stats show otherwise. I'm 61 years old, been riding my bike most days for 50 years - in the northeast, the first 25 in NYC and Boston, since then, in rural New England. My kids, i 'forced' them to ride their bikes growing up, and now in their 20s, they're strong as f*ck, used to weather, can take care of themselves....being on a bicycle was a big piece of their foundation. Less cars, more bikes; less 'new technology'; more human technology.
I agree that I think if kids were allowed to bike freely all over town, then it wouldn’t be as scary to do it in a car later on. It was my first taste of freedom as a kid and where I learned to solve problems when they popped up. I let my kids do this and my oldest who loves to photograph trains and planes does bike all over to capture images of trains at least. It’s not feasible for him to bike to the airport though, but he could get there by public transportation easily enough which I will let him do on his this summer (if only to experience the process of having to depend on public transport and it’s cost).
You're probably right. We "free-ranged" over a radius of many miles pre-driving age (during the sixties). "Be back by dinner time" was the only admonition.
Yes! Summer holidays: up in the morning, fixed your own breakfast, threw on some clothes (no phone, no cash), ran outside, grabbed the bike (which lay on the lawn all night), rang your friend's doorbell, and headed out for a day of adventure and exploration. The only rule: be home by suppertime.
Agree. Kids no longer are allowed to bike anywhere alone. So, kids aren't that into biking. And that refers to those whose patents bother to teach them how. I was horrified when I learned my sister and husband did not teach their kids to ride bikes. They made up a zillion excuses. For them, it was pure laziness. They justified not doing it claiming fear of strangers...but the reality was they were too immersed online to get off their behinds and teach their kids.
Neither child knows how to drive today and show no desire . Both stayed home to go to college. It is a sin, IMO. They have not yet lived at all. They do not know how, either. Both have taken jobs in the local town and still live at home. They could do better elsewhere but they are, of course, afraid to leave Mom and Dad.
Many municipalities allow bikes on public transit. NYC did even in the 70s when it was 'against the law'; and since then, big changes all over. If yr in a place w an airport, chances are some to the airport buses allow bikes on / on the front bike rack even. Esp because of labor force needed at airports; pay is low, so if yr a hustler w a bike...you bike to the bus to the airport. It's a way for kids to mix with labor also, and see just what we run on...cheap labor. Bikes = libration, can't say it enough (also, if there ISNT a bike friendly bus to the airport, there are bike buses to within biking distance OF the airport. Which is how i discovered lots of parts of Queens. Which to this day, are still invisible; like Brigadoon or any other mythic hidden place.
I love bike riding and always have. I remember that feeling of freedom when I first learned how to do it. Amazing!
I also remember when I turned eleven or twelve and I was allowed to ride to the strip mall near our neighborhood. I’d go to the pizza place and get one slice and a root beer. I felt like a real adult.
As my husband always points out when he sees bike-lanes with no one in them, bikes are 19th century technology.
Bikes are fun! Maybe you don’t like riding but no need to neg on those of us who do.
Funny, i feel the same way when i see people encased in cars which haven't really changed all that much since the mid 1900s!...cars COULD be way smaller, lighter, stronger, quicker longer lasting....made w space frames, carbon fiber, smaller form factor etc. Instead....a misapplication of best design practices; an extra application of 'marketing'. There's a great bunch of work by Armory Lovins around how to make better design choices around car design and house design too. But! instead, we choose phony opulence. I think about this often when i am zipping by cars stuck in traffic.
Make them smaller and lighter and they’ll be as big a death trap as a bicycle! Great idea and in keeping with WEF ideas.
Ha! had to look up 'World Economic Forum'. Nope - 'space frame' = much stronger than current typical car design. Space frames are far safer than current SUV design. And check out 'death per mile' rates for bicycle mile VS car mile, though of course in the intersection between a car and a bike, it's curtains for the latter. There are many different ways to be in the world; living in fear - death trap - and not using intelligent technology - that's assuming the corporatist POV that the WEF 'great idea' comment WANTS you to take. When you can be put into a box, for marketing, well then, you're easy to separate from your cash. When one lives outside the constraints of conventional life design - which a bicycle reminds one to do EVERY DAY - one is free.
Maybe the trends will move back in a different direction. We can be helpful for our young people. But the adults in the room need to step up.
Agreed. Our daughters are 26, 23 & 21 and all 3 had jobs at 16 and paid at least half for their 1st cars at 16. They weren’t happy about it at first but now claim both those things with pride & satisfaction. Adults have to have the courage to have expectations based on clear & intimate knowledge of what their children are capable of. The kids aren’t the only ones being lazy IMO.
Exactly. We always like to blame our young people, but who is raising them?
Their Internet peers.
I'm increasingly interested in the concept of a masculine presence infusing the joy of risk into the hormonal atmosphere. I just realized that it was my father who taught me how to swim, tie my shoes, ride a bicycle, do math (well not really, but he tried) jump off the high diving board, fly kites, not cry in the backseat of a plane he was flying, make bank deposits and write checks, roller skate, ice skate and, of course, supplement my high school driving course. And last but not least, it was my father who showed me how to buy a car and make the monthly payments.
But time and time again, when I hear of a kid failing to launch, they live at home with their MOM. They grew up with a single mother.
And in this matriarchal society, the following statement regarding "more permissive" sexual norms does not ring true:
"Alongside the decline in teen driving and employment, study after study shows that young people are having less sex, even as sexual norms have grown more permissive. The decline has been particularly pronounced among men, with almost 30 percent of those under thirty reportedly not having sex even once in the past year, a figure that tripled between 2008 and 2018."
It's the matriarchy that's driving the transgender craze of slicing off kids' genitals. It's the matriarchy that has kids talking about themselves through a therapeutic lens. It's the matriarchy that renders them anxious and insecure, because their mothers are. This is not a more sexually permissive society -- certainly NOT! When kids feel "traumatized" by a "sexual assault" that wasn't more than, say, a forced kiss that their predecessors would have laughed off!
The only thing about gender as a social construct is the idea of gender as a social construct. Men bring the T into the house, and it's the T that encourages kids to feel safe enough to take risks. It's hilarious to think that the feminists blamed men for "keeping women in the home" when women dominating discourse is now keeping EVERYONE in the home!
Kids do best with both a father and mother in the home.
Long post, but hear me out.
I live in NJ and have four sons ages: 21, 20, 18, and 16. Nobody is on meds. Nobody goes to a shrink. Average students. My 21 year old decided to skip college and works in sales in Florida. My 20 year old also didn't go to college and is in sales in Oregon. My 18 year old is a busser at a local restaurant and has worked since he was 15. He will be going to work with his brother for the summer in Oregon and then community college. My 16 year old has been working since he was 14 as a busser and also in fast food. He has 8k saved up for a car. You need to be 17 to drive in NJ. He said he wants his own car so we can't tell him what to do and when he can and can't use the car. Do I see the kids that are described in the article? Not in their friend groups, but I know they exist. I have nothing against ride share or public transportation, but at a certain point you need a car.
They still go to parties, hang in the park and drink, and push the boundaries like when I was a kid.
Sex? I'm the mom, so I don't want to ask. ewwww...... But I've seen hickies on their necks and condoms hidden in their room. I don't see as many relationships as I remember in high school. It seems to be a bit more of a hookup culture.
My kids are all independent. Nature? Nurture? Who knows. Not that they're older they will tell me that we're much less restrictive than their friends' parents. I DO notice that my youngest is the most independent and the most rebellious. He gets in trouble in school a LOT and it's the things that would have been a slap on the wrist when I was in high school.
The trend is disturbing, but I grateful that we have average, normal and well-adjusted boys. Knock wood.
You must be doing something right. Keep it up..
This piece is, in my opinion, very accurate. Safety-ism is rampant, and it is not preparing our youth to take the risks that eventually result in success. Instead, nestled within their parental-protection cocoons and absorbed in screen time, they makes their parents safe from allegations of child endangerment, and their friends reinforce the need to protect themselves from all those predators in the news, and all those murderous racist misogynist paternalistic homophobic psychopaths can be held at bay.
In my life, the greatest gains came from the greatest chances I took. I partially failed once, but recovered to make a lot of money from that partial failure, just in a different way than I originally expected. I too was grossly eager to get my first car. It meant freedom and an enormous new world of adventure to me. I remember the moment exactly - I literally jumped for joy. And that effort and risk made my life, at times absolutely exhilarating. I wouldn’t trade that excitement for anything else.